


In this Storm of Red

by mimimola



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Aged up Ahsoka, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Canon-Typical Violence, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, Eventual Romance, F/M, Happy Ending, Maulsoka, Mild Language, Post-Order 66, Season 7 Alternate Ending, i really like the idea of her being around 22 years old as seen in other fics!, mostly friendship but with a dash of pining teehee
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-14
Updated: 2020-05-21
Packaged: 2021-03-02 20:16:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 38,946
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24182716
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mimimola/pseuds/mimimola
Summary: Ahsoka glanced around the hangar bay for an exit. If they could make it down below and reach the Y-Wings, if she could cut a hole into the ground―Suddenly, a roar of engines and a rush of wind burst through the hangar.“Ahsoka!” Rex exclaimed. “Look!”Daring to look back, Ahsoka turned her head and her jaw dropped.Maul hadreturned. He came back.
Relationships: Darth Maul & Ahsoka Tano, Darth Maul/Ahsoka Tano
Comments: 52
Kudos: 239
Collections: Jedi Journals





	1. Chapter 1

Rex cried out as a blast hit his shoulder. “Can’t hold them off!”

Ahsoka could feel Maul’s fury as she kept her hold on the shuttle as it tried to take off, but she closed her eyes and relented, letting him go so she could run back to help Rex. It was just the two of them now, she was frightened and she knew there was a possibility they wouldn't make it out alive, but she would do anything to protect her old friend.

The more Ahsoka deflected the blasts and Rex stunned the clones, the more tired they got.

“Damn him,” Ahsoka cursed Maul internally. She glanced around the hangar bay for an exit. If they could make it down below and reach the Y-Wings, if she could cut a hole into the ground―

Suddenly, a roar of engines and a rush of wind burst through the hangar.

“Ahsoka!” Rex exclaimed. “Look!”

Daring to look back, Ahsoka turned her head and her jaw dropped.

Maul had _returned. He came back._

The shuttle’s guns were aimed at the clones and though killing her former soldiers was the last thing she wanted, she knew Maul was saving their lives.

“Let’s go!” Rex shouted over the blasterfire and explosions Maul was causing. He’d lowered the shuttle enough for them to jump in but Ahsoka stopped herself as she and Rex hid behind the vehicle to shield themselves from the blasts.

“What are you waiting for?” Maul growled, peering over at them.

“You came back,” Ahsoka said, immediately distrustful but also amazed. “Why?”

“No time for catching up, now get in!” Maul yelled impatiently. Rex, to Ahsoka's surprise, entered the vehicle swiftly.

“Come on, Ahsoka!” he encouraged her, holding out his hand. “The ship is entering the planet's atmosphere, we need to go!”

She took his hand and they were off quickly. Thankfully Maul had turned on the shuttle’s deflector shields and they hadn't taken much damage. The clones on the other hand…

Ahsoka’s heart broke as the Star Destroyer grew smaller and smaller. The dead soldiers soon became tiny dots, and then she couldn’t see them anymore. Some were most likely still alive after Maul’s final assault, but not for long. The ship was soon caught in the planet’s gravity and the crash would be catastrophic. All of those clones, her troops, under _her_ command, were going to die.

Ahsoka scrambled up to the tiny cockpit where Maul sat, steering them away from the Star Destroyer, which was beginning to disappear into the clouds. His hand hovered over the hyperdrive until he noticed her coming. His eyes narrowed.

“Turn around,” she told him. “We need to go to that planet.”

“We _just_ escaped with our lives,” Maul said with gritted teeth, though his voice was soft. “And you want to go back? For what purpose?”

“Just do it,” Ahsoka retorted, trying not to raise her voice. She looked down where Rex sat. He had removed his helmet and was completely silent as he stared at his boots. She turned to Maul again. “I need to… take care of them,” she whispered so only he could hear.

He seemed to understand, his eyes widening slightly. He finally nodded and headed for the planet's surface, but he grumbled to himself all the way down.

What was left of Ahsoka's heart was now completely shattered as they came across the crash site. She found herself squeezed in next to Maul so she could look out the window of the cockpit, but she didn’t care that he had less room. The Destroyer remained mostly intact and the open hangar bay was clearly visible, but it was all burning and crumpled.

Ahsoka laid a hand on the glass to steady herself. She could feel Maul’s eyes on her as they got closer to the ground. Her eyes and nose burned―but she would not cry, partially because she didn’t want Maul to see her in a weak state, but also because she wanted to be strong for Rex. She could feel his pain; she could ignore hers.

They landed and Ahsoka slowly removed herself from the cockpit, gave Rex a reassuring pat on the shoulder and stepped out of the shuttle.

The smoke from the fires made it nearly impossible to find their way to the destroyed hangar, but they made it. There were no clones to be seen outside of the Destroyer, and Ahsoka was a little relieved―at least in the moment they died, they were all inside together.

Rex was still silent and turned away when she glanced at him. She felt the tears threatening to come again and she abruptly turned back around.

“What are you doing?” Maul demanded, holding out a hand as if to grab her arm, but he didn’t. Perhaps he thought she was going to try and take the shuttle from him.

“I’m getting a shovel,” she bit out, blinking her eyes rapidly. She wanted a second to herself while she looked for one in the shuttle so she could at least cry in peace, but for now she held his gaze.

“Do you know how many clones are in there?” Maul asked rhetorically. “Are you really going to bury every single one of them?”

“They don’t deserve to be left like that,” she said, glancing back at Rex again, who hadn’t moved. She walked past Maul, but he followed her.

“Do you want an apology from me for killing them?” he snarled. “I will apologize, fine, but we must leave now. Who knows when more clones will come.”

“You’re not really sorry, though,” Ahsoka began to raise her voice, now that they were some distance from Rex and nearing the shuttle.

“No, I am not.”

“Listen!” She turned around and ignited one of her lightsabers. Despite feeling so drained from their escape, her anger towards Maul renewed her energy. “I am going to bury every single one of those men and there’s nothing you can do to stop me! I didn’t ask for your help or your advice! I _will_ bury them!”

“Why, exactly? Out of a sense of duty?” He folded his arms, his posture stiff.

“No,” she said and her lip trembled. “It’s my fault.”

“No need to take all the credit, Lady Tano,” he said with a grimace. Why was he addressing her like that all of a sudden? “After all, was it not you who set me loose so I could kill them? You used me,” he then added.

“Exactly,” Ahsoka answered and a tear slipped before she could stop it. She lowered the lightsaber, letting it hang by her side. “I _did_ use you, and it _is_ my fault. They’re dead because of me." Maul looked at her with surprise. His arms loosened and he watched her closely, but she looked away. “If I hadn’t been so hasty, if I had planned better, Rex and I could’ve gotten away without anyone dying. We still could’ve―”

“Impossible,” he cut her off. “Plan as many scenarios in your head as you want, but there is no outcome that wouldn’t have resulted in someone's death.”

Ahsoka wiped the tear away quickly and blinked a few times before regaining her composure. Crying in front of Maul was not something she thought she would do, nor had she expected him to offer words of comfort, as crude and impatient as they were.

“Now,” Maul continued, speaking softly and looking around the interior of the shuttle. “Bury your clones if you must. But afterwards, we immediately depart, or I will not hesitate in leaving you here.”

“How generous of you,” she snapped back, but somehow she felt better. What kind of effect was this man having on her?

It didn’t take her long to find a shovel, but she knew it would be many hours before every single clone was found and laid to rest. Maul walked back with her to the crash site for some reason, but she knew he would not help. She didn’t really want to ask Rex to help bring the bodies out, as she feared that would make him more upset. However, she found that he’d already started, gently lining up the dead clones on the ground when she and Maul returned.

“Thank you, Rex,” Ahsoka said. She found a suitable spot of ground and began to dig.

“What are you doing?” she heard Rex ask. It was the first time he’d spoken since they’d escaped the Star Destroyer, but the question was not directed towards her. She turned around.

“We are on a tight schedule,” Maul answered gruffly. “Might as well speed things along.”

Ahsoka's chest tightened as she watched the two men go inside the ship to retrieve more bodies. He was actually _helping._ He said it was because they were in a hurry, but she had a feeling it was more than that.

Hours later, all of the clones were outside and Ahsoka had dug up dozens of holes, though there were plenty more needed. She wiped her brow, unable to remember when was the last time she ate something, or what it was that she ate.

“You should rest, kid,” Rex told her. “I think Maul and I can get this done by nightfall.”

“What? Are you sure?” she asked in surprise. Only hours ago, Maul had been their enemy. Now he and Rex seemed to be amicable. It was baffling to her.

“Give it here,” Maul said, holding his hand out for the shovel. She handed it to him and he resumed digging the holes. He was continually surprising her today. She nodded to Rex and went back to the shuttle. She’d rest for a while, then help them bury the bodies.

* * *

It was late into the night when the three of them were finally finished. They sat around a campfire near to their vehicle, wanting to be far away from the wreckage at the moment. Rex thankfully found rations inside their transport, and though Ahsoka ate her share for much-needed strength, she no longer had any appetite. She was worn down, emotionally and physically. Her body would be sore tomorrow from all the digging and carrying, and she was not looking forward to it.

“I'll take first watch,” she volunteered nonetheless. She wanted Rex to get some sleep, and she still didn’t trust Maul enough to shut her eyes while he was around. Rex was too exhausted to argue and was out in a heartbeat. She glanced at him sadly as she stoked the fire. She may have lost her soldiers, but he had lost his brothers.

“You don’t trust me to keep watch, do you?” Maul asked. He sat upright, arms crossed, looking at her with those bright, yellow eyes.

“Were you going to volunteer?”

“Hm, perhaps.”

“The answer is no. I don’t trust you.”

“The feeling is mutual.”

Ahsoka sighed, distracting herself from looking at him by throwing a few more twigs into the fire. It seemed they were both too stubborn to sleep. She glanced at the now sleeping Rex once more.

“Why are you two getting along now?” she asked Maul, eyes narrowing. “You have to know that’s suspicious to me.”

“Yes, yes, I understand,” Maul sighed dramatically. “I can see it can be hard for you to understand that people―people who are supposed to be enemies―can find common ground.”

Ahsoka sneered at him, a tight-lipped and mocking smile. She knew he was referring to all of the times he offered his hand to her and she refused. “So what was it?” she asked.

“What was what?” He sounded just as annoyed as she felt.

“What common ground did you and Rex find?”

He was silent for a moment, watching the flames in front of him and he slouched. He seemed to be looking for the right words to say.

“The clones call each other ‘brother,’” he said slowly. “And Captain Rex has lost all of his brothers, to Order 66 and to this godforsaken planet,” he spit out the last word, clearly wanting to leave this place. “I told him…” He contemplated, and Ahsoka found herself leaning forward, wanting to hear what he had to say, but he was hesitant.

“I told him that I too had lost a brother, not long ago.”

“You had a brother?”

“Savage,” he said with a nod, and he sat upright again, pride in his voice. “He found me when I was lost. The two of us were unstoppable together.” He smiled a little, remembering, though Ahsoka couldn’t imagine what happy memories they could be. “Today was the first time I spoke of him since―” He cut himself off abruptly, looking away.

Ahsoka was taken aback. Whatever had happened to his brother, it was clearly painful. The look in his eyes, the sadness, and the _fear_ … It was the same fear she saw in him when he spoke of his former master. She had a strong feeling Darth Sidious was the one who’d taken Maul’s brother from him.

It was strange, seeing Maul look so sad in this moment. She had always seen him as a dangerous warlord, not as a person with family, a brother, someone he cared about. She realized she truly didn’t understand him, didn’t understand why he did the things he did.

“Something else you are curious about?” Maul noticed, eyes flickering back to her. It wasn’t really a question.

“Back at the ship, everything was happening so fast,” she said, shaking her head. It was still hard to believe that the attack of the clones, the Star Destroyer crashing and the burial had all occured in the same day. “And I asked you… why you came back.”

His stiff posture became even stiffer.

“Why _did_ you come back for us?” she asked, but she could tell he was starting to close up.

“I think I’m done talking about myself, Lady Tano,” he said, avoiding her question. He leaned back against a boulder, arms still crossed. “If you wish to wake me later in the night to take watch, I will oblige you.” And with that, he closed his eyes and was silent.

Ahsoka shook her head, glancing around their campsite before tending to the fire once more. There was that title again, “Lady Tano”. Where was it coming from? And his manner with her, though still intense and blunt, was also gentle. It reminded her of their second confrontation in the throne room on Mandalore, when he’d asked her to join him. Of course, their duel following that confrontation had been anything but. However, Ahsoka found that she couldn’t get a good idea of his character. This former Sith, this man from Dathomir, was a lot more complex than she thought, just like any other living being. Now that they weren’t completely at odds with another, she found talking with him wasn’t so horrible. It actually helped.

But now that they were done with their conversation, Ahsoka was alone with her thoughts again. What were they going to do tomorrow? As easy as it was to speak with Maul, they were still not on the same page. He would want to go one way, and she and Rex another.

Where could they go? Who could they turn to? She was scared to imagine whether the other Jedi were alive or not; Master Yoda, Obi-Wan, _Anakin…_

It wasn’t difficult to put Anakin out of her mind amidst the chaos from today, but now her mind was plagued with thoughts of her former master. She’d heard his screaming voice, his confusion, his _anger_. She’d only felt that anger from him once before on Mortis. She couldn’t help but worry for him, and she didn’t want to think that he and the others could be dead, but the clones were ruthless. She, Rex and Maul had barely made it out themselves.

Ahsoka felt hopeless and trapped. She would never be able to return to Coruscant, of that she was certain. They’d have to go into hiding for an indefinite amount of time, perhaps for forever. She had no idea what to do. Perhaps a new day would shed some light and restore hope for them.

Wanting to let Rex sleep some more, she ended up deciding to wake Maul after all a couple of hours later. His eyes opened immediately at the call of his name. She was hesitant to close her eyes at first, but she had a feeling, a strong feeling from the Force, telling her it was okay to trust him, that in this moment, they would be safe. And so she slept, thankful for a dreamless sleep.

* * *

The air was immediately tense when Rex woke her the next morning. There was no visible conflict with Maul as he calmly put out the fire, but the three of them knew they needed to decide their next step.

“This shuttle is useless,” Maul spoke up first. “I suggest we stop at the next inhabitable planet to resupply and get another ship.”

“Are you going to contact your Shadow Collective?” Ahsoka said, anxious and on guard as she stood. He regarded her with narrowed eyes.

“For the time being, no,” he answered. “I’ve ordered them to go into hiding; I’d be putting my entire operation in jeopardy if I contacted them out in the open.”

“So… what do we do when we get to another planet?” Rex asked. “I mean, really.”

The unanswered question hung in the air: when are we going back to being enemies? For some reason, Ahsoka didn’t want to ask nor have it answered. Perhaps it was the Force offering guidance to her again, or maybe it had to do with their conversation last night, but she didn’t want to have to attack Maul and go back to square one. Whatever progress she and Rex had made with Maul the previous day, it was still much too fragile and she didn’t want to ruin it.

“Let’s lay low for a while,” Ahsoka offered. “We’ll need credits to get a ship, and I don’t have a single one. You’ll need a change of clothes once we get there,” she added to Rex. “Who knows who we’ll come across.”

Maul seemed relieved. “Then let us depart.”

“I just need a minute,” she said. She looked back at the graves they made. “Only a minute.”

Maul looked like he wanted to argue, and Rex looked concerned, but neither protested.

“I’ll go warm up the engines,” Rex said quietly, and went into the shuttle.

The walk to the burial ground seemed to take a lot longer than Ahsoka thought. She couldn’t decide between walking quickly or dragging her feet, her heart hurting every step of the way.

Rows and rows of dirt mounds lay before her. Each one had a long stick poking out, topped with a helmet corresponding with every clone. She saw Jesse’s blue helmet, and she saw all the helmets with orange and white markings, painted on for her. Her heart ached for these fallen soldiers and all of the soldiers throughout the galaxy, each one ordered to do something no one could have predicted. Many had probably died in the process and many were sure to still be alive and carrying out orders.

She took the lightsabers from her belt and held them in her hands, looking down at them. They were the ones Anakin had given to her, and she hadn’t had them for very long.

“What are you going to do with those?” a low voice asked. She turned to see that it was Maul, standing a few feet away, staring at her. She looked back at the sabers, then at the helmets.

“If any clones, or any of Darth Sidious’s followers come across this planet, they’ll see the crashed ship and the helmets and assume everyone is dead,” Ahsoka said, contemplating. “They’ll know I was on this ship, and that I was supposed to die here.” She turned to face him. “If I leave these lightsabers here, they will think that I’m dead. I’ll have some insurance that way.”

“Yes, but…” he said as he walked towards her. “Those are two very capable weapons you hold in your hands. Whatever dangers you come across in the future, you’ll need those to protect yourself.”

Ahsoka could protect herself without lightsabers just fine, but she knew that’s not what Maul meant, that he wasn’t undermining her ability to defend herself.

“I can’t,” she finally said, shaking her head. “Lightsabers are easily recognizable and people will know that I’m― _was_ ―a Jedi. It’s not a good idea.”

“Better to keep them and lose them yourself, rather than let them go to waste here,” he suggested, and then he sensed her suspicion and raised his hands sarcastically. “Or, if you’d rather throw them away forever, be my guest. A lightsaber is one’s life, is it not? Are you going to throw your life so easily?”

Satisfied with his own words, Maul left and Ahsoka was left deep in thought. _Throw my life away, huh?_ she wondered. _Throw my life away as me, or as a Jedi?_

She gripped the lightsabers tightly. Perhaps she would hold on to them for a bit longer. They were a gift from Anakin, after all. She didn’t know for certain what had happened to him, and if he really was dead, if she’d never seen him again, this was the last thing she’d be able to keep that would remind her of him, aside from memories.

Fine. She’d risk the knowledge of her survival reaching the enemy. She hooked them back onto her belt and went to the shuttle.

* * *

It wasn’t long before they reached a small planet called Nimzii. Small, but clearly with a big population. The city they landed in was bright and cheerful, with tall buildings and people from all walks of life going about their day. They managed to sell the shuttle and some items inside for a good amount of credits. Now all they needed was a place to stay and recover for a while.

“This’ll get us a room, and then some,” Ahsoka said proudly as she stared at the newly acquired credits Maul held in his hands. She turned to Rex, who was wearing different clothes now. It was odd to see him wear something other than his uniform, and he looked uncomfortable and lost in thought. “Everything alright?” she asked.

“Yeah, fine,” he assured with a weak smile, pulling his hat over his face. “Just hoping not to get recognized.”

“It is unlikely we will run into any clones,” Maul said.

“Oh no. Think again,” Ahsoka groaned. She beckoned them and the three of them peeked around a corner. Sure enough, there were a couple of troopers walking amongst the citizens. Their uniforms were pure white, like some of the clones Ahsoka had noticed on the Destroyer. She stood upright and faced the men, putting on the hood of her cloak. Maul mimicked her action. “I think we should split up. Until one of us finds a place to stay, we shouldn’t be seen together, I’m afraid it’ll attract attention.”

“I agree,” Maul said, which surprised her. She handed out comm links and they separated. She watched Rex, now dressed like any other person, march down one street while Maul, a cloaked, dark figure, headed down another. She wasn’t sure if this would be the last time she saw him, and she wouldn’t have minded it at all. Well, maybe a little.

Ahsoka was grateful for this opportunity to be alone for a while. She knew it wouldn’t be hard for them to find shelter, and it _was_ important for them not to draw attention to themselves, but she needed to be away from anyone for a while and free her mind from thoughts of Maul, whose words from yesterday and this morning she couldn’t forget.

She walked leisurely across a crowded plaza and blended in easily. She kept her expression passive and made sure her steps were neither too slow nor too quick. For a moment, she found herself feeling like a padawan again, running an errand on Coruscant. The architecture and culture was different from her previous home, of course, but it still had that familiar city atmosphere. On her off days on Coruscant, when she wasn’t performing her duties as commander for the Jedi, she enjoyed taking these mindless strolls, listening to the sounds of people chatting with each other, shop owners selling their wares, speeders racing through the street, children laughing as they held hands with their parents. It was almost cruel, the way her mind let her have this peaceful moment and remember a life she’d left. She’d almost forgotten that there were clone troopers around.

On the other side of the plaza, she saw a sign belonging to an old motel, advertising vacancy. She smiled. This would be the perfect place to stay. The area was so crowded and much more distracting; every single establishment in the plaza, every building and fruit stand was occupied with people every second. It’d be so easy to slip past unwanted notice.

“Guys, I found us a place,” she said into the comm link, pleased with their luck.

“As did I,” a familiar voice said to her left.

“Were you following me?” she accused. She heard Rex respond, “On my way,” as Maul’s hooded eyes gazed at her. So he hadn’t left after all…

“I was drawn to this very spot,” he said. He closed his eyes for a second, as if taking in some kind of energy. Then he gazed at her again. “Were you not?”

“No―I mean, in a way, I suppose. Why?”

“Hm,” he pondered, his eyes never left hers. “Did you think I was going to run off?”

“Can you blame me if I did?”

“No,” he conceded. “But I was serious about us working together before. I have no desire to kill you, Lady Tano.”

“ _Stop offering me to join you,_ ” she said, emphasizing every word as they walked towards the motel. “The only reason it seems like we’re on the same side is because we’re on the run. That’s the only thing we have in common.”

“You know that isn’t true.”

Ahsoka was about to argue when Rex came up to them.

“Sorry I’m late,” he said. “I found a place to get some food for later.”

“Thank you, Rex,” Ahsoka told him and then gestured towards the entrance. “I’ll go in first, then you, and then Rex. Each of us will be getting our own rooms. Is that good enough for you, Maul?” She held out her hand and Maul stared at it quizzically. “Credits,” she prompted. He dropped them into her hand and their fingers brushed. Though he wore gloves, Ahsoka could still feel the warmth of his skin through the material. She closed a fist around the money, trying to ignore how oddly comforting his hand had felt. She then counted the credits and divided the amount between the three of them equally.

“The three of us will talk later.” She glared at Maul once more. “Don’t cause any trouble.”

“You have so little faith in me,” he chided lightly, amused.

* * *

Over the next few days, the three runaways managed to acquire information of the aftermath of Order 66, though not a single soul on Nimzii seemed to know it was called that, and Ahsoka suspected it was the same case everywhere else. No one knew of Darth Sidious’s plan, no one knew of the clones turning on the Jedi and killing them all. As far as anyone was concerned, the Jedi were traitors to the Republic, which was now called the Galactic Empire, ruled by Galactic Emperor Palpatine.

This new knowledge was a kick to the face. All this time, Chancellor Palpatine had been Darth Sidious, operating right under everyone’s noses, pulling all the strings in his office while the Jedi Temple was only a short distance away. There was also news of the Emperor’s newest second-in-command, Darth Vader. There was a feeling that grew in the back of Ahsoka’s head when she heard his name, but she deliberately ignored it.

Lastly, the clone troopers were no longer called clone troopers, but were now stormtroopers instead. Hearing Rex explain this to her and Maul, it broke Ahsoka’s heart. The men Rex grew up with, and thousands of others, were now part of a new order that would use them for evil. But then again, was the Republic ever really using them for good?

Ahsoka, Rex and Maul continued with their plan and kept a low profile and didn’t see much of each other. For Rex, he was his usual quiet self whenever Ahsoka saw him. He was very good at not being seen, and he would have no trouble hiding. However, Ahsoka could sense there was something on his mind. She never saw it on his face, but she could tell seeing the stormtroopers here on Nimzii upset him greatly. She wished she could comfort her friend, but it was beyond her ability. It was just too personal for him.

As for Maul, Ahsoka was anxious whenever she saw him and whenever he was out of her sight. She had no idea what he was planning, or what her own plan was going forward. Soon, it wouldn’t be enough to stay on this planet and they were all going to have to face reality, though she didn’t want to. She could sense that Maul didn’t want to, either.

He addressed her as the usual, “Lady Tano,” whenever they gathered for a quick meeting to update each other on the goings-on in the Empire. At first she thought he was mocking her, and perhaps he was at the beginning, but it didn’t really feel that way. Whenever he spoke with her, he was now hesitant, like he was holding back from something. It bothered her. She almost wanted to start an argument with him for the hell of it and see his temper flare. At least then he’d be acting normally.

One night, the three of them were supposed to meet in Maul’s room for their usual gathering, but he was nowhere to be found and his room was unoccupied.

“Maul?” Ahsoka called out into the dark space.

“Did he run off?” Rex asked the question before she did.

“I bet he did,” she said, gritting her teeth. “So much for him wanting to work together. Good riddance.”

“Or,” Rex suggested as he considered for a moment. “Or maybe something’s holding him up. The streets are quite dangerous at night. He could be in trouble.”

“Either way, we can’t have him causing a scene.” Ahsoka pinched the bridge of her nose.

“Let’s go, then.”

“No, it’s okay, I should go alone,” she said with a frustrated sigh. “It’s safer, the less the three of us are seen together.”

She donned her cloak and once she made it outside, she pulled her hood over her head and walked in a random direction, trying to sense him in the city―if he _was_ in the city, that was. It was a lot quieter now, with fewer people walking around. She hoped to find him soon. It seemed the Force wanted her to find him as well, as she felt anxious and on edge, and she couldn’t decide if those feelings were her own, Maul’s, or the Force’s way of telling her to hurry it up―or just all three.

Ahsoka kept patrolling the city with more urgency now, reaching underneath her cloak to feel for her lightsabers for reassurance. She hoped she didn’t have to use them, especially on him. What he said to her when they first arrived on Nimzii stuck with her:

_“I have no desire to kill you.”_

_Nor I you,_ she thought.

Finally, she sensed his presence. He was panicked and frustrated; she needed to find him soon. She turned down a dark alleyway and knew that he was close by. Then, she heard the familiar chatter of troopers, comm link feedback and lights coming her way. She was about to jump to the top of a small building where she knew she could hide in safety, but suddenly a hand grabbed her arm from out of nowhere and dragged her inside said building.

She ripped from the hand’s grasp and raised her fists in defense. She relaxed a little after seeing it was the person she was looking for.

“What the _hell_ are you doing in here?” she whispered in annoyance, coming to crouch by him on the floor. Maul peeked out the window before turning to her.

“What are _you_ doing in here? Was it not you who was constantly reminding us to be careful?”

“We were supposed to meet in your room tonight, remember? So I decided to come looking for you, to make sure you weren't―”

“To make sure I wasn’t running away?” he snapped.

“Yes!” she hissed back. It was her turn to look out the window now; the troopers would be here soon. “So what are you doing out here, anyway?”

“I’ve been hiding from those clones for hours, I didn’t want to lead them back to the motel. They saw me earlier today and thought I was suspicious.”

“Were you being suspicious?”

“I wasn’t trying to be,” he growled. “Now that you’re here, we may just get out of this. I suggest we kill them and hide the bodies.”

“No,” Ahsoka said, leaning away from him. “I won’t do that.”

“If they catch us, they will arrest us and find your lightsabers, it’s the only way. If it makes you feel any better, they’re all brainwashed, so you’d be putting them out of their misery.”

“No,” she repeated firmly. “I won’t do it. It’s not the―” She stopped herself, about to say, “it’s not the Jedi way” without a second thought.

“Do you see another alternative to killing them?” Maul asked, not missing the way she faltered.

“When they start blasting at us, we deflect them and then get close enough to render them unconscious,” Ahsoka suggested.

“That will not only cause a commotion, but also reveal our identities,” Maul said, then added, “And what do you mean, ‘we’?”

She took out her lightsabers. “Here, you can have the shorter one. Don’t ruin it.”

He took the saber in surprise, looking at it before his gaze met hers again.

“Are we doing this or aren’t we?” Ahsoka prompted impatiently.

He nodded and stood, opening the door for her and it slid open with a _hiss._ They stepped out into the alleyway and met the five stormtroopers face-to-face. They instantly aimed their blasters at them.

“Hold it right there!” one of them said, and then he noticed Ahsoka. “I see you’ve brought a friend, we’re taking you both in.”

Ahsoka nodded to Maul and they ignited the sabers.

“Where’d you get those?” another trooper demanded.

“Isn’t it obvious?” Maul said slowly. “We stole them from a Jedi after we killed him.”

“Terminate them!” The first trooper began to speak into his comm link as another sent a blast Maul’s way. “We have two armed―”

Ahsoka stepped in front of Maul and deflected the blast, sending it back and destroying the comm link on the first trooper’s arm. He jumped back in surprise.

“Blast ‘em!” he ordered. The five men fired away and Ahsoka and Maul countered them all, deflecting them towards the stone walls of buildings and to the ground. Ahsoka was relieved that Maul followed her plan. Once they were close enough, they knocked them unconscious, kicking them in the head or using the saber’s hilt to knock them down. As Ahsoka was fighting a trooper, he managed to knock her weapon out of her hand before she kneed him in the stomach and he landed in a heap.

The last stormtrooper took his opportunity to shoot at her, but Maul beat him to it and he fell to the ground in no time. The two of them stood out of breath, looking at one another. Maul quickly reached for her fallen saber, and for a moment she thought he was about to attack her, but instead, he held out both of the sabers in one hand for her to take.

“Thanks,” she said quietly as she accepted them. Again, as their hands touched, she was shocked by how warm he was  and pulled away quickly.

“Your plan worked,” Maul admitted begrudgingly. “But this won’t stop the rest of them. They _will_ come looking for us.”

“Then I guess we’ve overstayed our welcome,” Ahsoka agreed, returning the lightsabers to her belt. “It’s about time we left this place anyway, isn’t it? Let’s go.”

They walked back to the motel wordlessly. It was the dead of night and not a single soul was outside except for them. Ahsoka saw Maul take off his hood, and he must have felt safe enough to do it, so she did the same. She felt a cool breeze caress her face, still reeling from the adrenaline of the fight. It was different from when she’d dueled him on Mandalore. Fighting each other was one thing, but fighting _together_ … It felt good. Really good. And she sensed when they teamed up against the stormtroopers, he felt the same way.

“You found me by sensing me through the Force,” Maul said suddenly, breaking her out of her reverie.

“Yes,” she answered. “I could feel you panicking, I was getting―”

“Worried?”

She looked at him, turning her head sharply. Truthfully, she was. But she didn’t want to admit it out loud. Maul found his answer in her silence.

“I’ll only say this once,” he muttered. “Thank you for coming.”

“You’re welcome,” she returned. “Next time, though, make sure to contact us and tell us what happened.”

“Next time?” he repeated, raising a brow at her, amused. “So you expect this to become a recurring thing?”

“Me saving your ass?” she taunted.

“Yes, that, but also… _us_ … working together.” He blinked at her, his yellows eyes glowing in the dark.

The way he emphasized “us” made her nearly falter in her footsteps. What did he mean by that? It didn’t matter. Ahsoka looked away from him and focused on remembering the way back to the motel. As good and right as it felt to fight alongside Maul, she knew it was meant to be a one time thing. It’d never happen again.

“Your goals are different from mine,” she protested half-heartedly, her heart beginning to sink as she realized what she was saying. “You want to gain power and destroy Darth Sidious.”

“And what is wrong with that? Does he not need to be destroyed?” He looked sharply at her. “On Mandalore, you said that I would only take his place, but you overestimate my ambition. I do not wish to be a Sith again. I seek power, yes, but not in the way you think.”

“Then how _do_ you seek power, Maul?”

“In the shadows,” he answered darkly. “That is where I thrive, and that is what I’ve come to terms with. I do not need to become a terrible figurehead to rule over the galaxy, I only need people to fear me. Fear inspires loyalty.”

“Loyalty should inspire loyalty,” Ahsoka argued. “And duty, and respect, and trust! Not forced obedience and fear!”

“Hm, and how did that work out for you and the Jedi?”

“I never said anything about the _Jedi_ ,” she fumed. “I don’t need you to constantly remind me of their faults, I’ve accepted them and moved on.” That was partially a lie, of course. She would never go back to being a Jedi, but she still hadn’t quite moved on from her teachings. After all, there were some good things: compassion for others, justice… even though in the end, she was only meant to be a soldier and the views of the Jedi seemed to contradict one another, and it proved to be their downfall. Her heart ached for the millionth time as she was reminded of her time as a padawan.

“Then can you do the same for me?” Maul asked. He looked angry and hurt. “Can you accept me? You are no longer a Jedi, I am no longer a Sith. Our methods are different, but you and I are no longer bound by rules and authority. We are free.”

“We’re not free,” Ahsoka said, shoulders sagging. “Not in the way you think, now that Palpatine is in complete power.”

That rendered him silent, and normally she would take that as a victory, but the reality of the Galactic Empire and its terrible ruler was nothing to feel victorious about.

“You need to understand,” she continued, meeting his gaze. “You just said our methods are different, and they are, there’s no working around that. Can I accept you? Maybe. But I can’t go down the same path as you. I’m no longer a Jedi, but I know who I am. And the person that I am… is not someone who can join your cause.”

The anger disappeared from his eyes as he gazed into hers. She felt sorry for him. She may not ever know the details of his past, but she knew there was pain there, and loss―so much loss, just like her. Even if their views weren’t the same, they were alike in a lot of ways, more alike than Ahsoka would care to admit.

“I…” Maul turned away from her and kept his eyes ahead of him. “I understand.” The following silence was oddly comforting, and they finally reached the motel. But there was still one thing Ahsoka needed to say. She cleared her throat as they were about to go inside and he turned to her expectantly.

“You still haven’t told me why you came back for us.”

“Ah, this again,” he sighed, but he wasn’t annoyed. “Is it that important to you?”

“What are you up to, Maul?”

“For once, Lady Tano,” he said gently. “I have no plan.”

She made a step towards him. “And why do you keep calling me that?”

“Does it offend you?”

She folded her arms. “If you’re deliberately offending me, then yes, it does.”

“That is not my intention,” he said, stepping towards her as well. “Believe it or not, I think very highly of you.” He was right in front of her now. “I respect you, hence the ‘Lady Tano’.”

Ahsoka tried not to smile, but she couldn’t help herself. It was the first time she’d smiled in a few days, and this was something worth smiling for. He seemed surprised at her expression, but returned her smile softly, and they were caught in a quiet, peaceful moment between the two of them.

But were soon interrupted when Rex ran up to them.

“Oh, you’re back!” he sighed with relief. “I was about to go and get you myself.”

“What’s wrong?” Ahsoka asked, anxious.

“I saw some stormtroopers walking about. They’re looking for two people who carry lightsabers on them.” He looked at them reproachfully. “Don’t tell me it was you two?!”

Ahsoka and Maul exchanged glances, and she answered with a sigh, “Yes, it was us.”

“We need to get out of here, _now_ ,” Rex said, pulling his hat down further. “Maul, you mentioned a place where we can get a ship?”

“Yes,” Maul answered. “This way.” And they took off.

It took them a while to reach the ship hangar and they had no time to haggle over a price with the vendor, but soon they’d purchased a ship and were ready to leave.

That was, until they were completely surrounded by stormtroopers. Ahsoka checked her surroundings desperately. They were still some distance away from the wide open exit to the hangar bay, and this time, the soldiers were not planning to arrest them. Blaster shots went everywhere, a storm of red light.

“Take cover!” Rex roared. Ahsoka dove behind a console and watched as Rex was shot in the leg. He collapsed to the ground and cried out in pain.

“NO!” she yelled. Maul grabbed him and hauled him over to their newly acquired ship, and Ahsoka knew what she had to do. For the first time in days, she had a plan. She ran out in the open, dodging blaster fire before making it over to them. Rex groaned, the wound in his leg very great.

“He’ll be fine,” Maul assured her, and then he glanced out the open door. “We need to _go._ ”

“We won’t make it!” Ahsoka said, making sure Rex was resting comfortably in the passenger seat in the cockpit. “They’ll blast this ship to pieces before we even leave the hangar.” As if on cue, an explosion rocked the ship and they scrambled to hold onto something. “I have an idea.”

“Which is?” Maul asked impatiently.

“I’ll hold them off and give you enough time to leave,” she told him, standing upright and heading for the exit. “Get him to a medical droid or _someone_ to help him as soon as possible.”

“You can’t be serious!” he exclaimed, making to grab her wrist, but she was out of reach.

“Kid,” they heard Rex say weakly. “What are you… doing?”

“They’re not going to imprison you,” Maul continued. “They’re going to kill you!”

“I know that, I know!” she shouted, shaking all over. “But his life― _both of your lives_ ―matter too much to me to not do anything about it!” She was already out of the ship before he could protest further. “I’m doing this,” she told him softly as she could hear the troopers advancing. “We may not have been on the same side, we may never be, but you still came back for us on that Star Destroyer. Let me return the favor.”

“Wait―”

“ _Go. Please._ ” And she let the ship’s ramp lift and close shut. Satisfied when she heard the engines of the ship roar to life, Ahsoka ignited her lightsabers and advanced. She still didn’t want to kill these soldiers, but she was afraid she might not have a choice this time if she wanted to protect Rex and Maul. A gust of wind whipped through her head tails as the ship lifted from the ground and began to take off.

“Concentrate all fire on the ship!” she heard one of the stormtroopers yell.

“Oh no you don’t!” she said through clenched teeth and she sprinted towards them. There were too many of them now, all advancing towards her and the ship. With the heaviest heart, she deflected their blasts back towards them, killing half a dozen in seconds. She glanced back at the ship; it was nearly out.

“Just a little longer,” she muttered and she took the men head on, bending low to knock them off their feet and impaling them as she went. She managed to take out the entire first wave by the time the ship disappeared into the sky. She breathed a sigh of relief. Tentatively, she reached out to feel Maul’s presence inside the ship. She felt the usual: anger and rage but also… fear? Fear for what? What was he afraid of?

Her attention was drawn away by the arrival of more troopers, weapons aimed at her. Ahsoka closed her eyes and took a deep breath. _It’s okay. I’m okay. As long as you’re safe._ She was about to raise her hands and surrender, about to drop her lightsabers for the last time, when suddenly the ceiling began to shake. The stormtroopers looked up, some raising their hands to shield themselves from falling debris.

Then the ceiling fell.

With a powerful force of motion, tons of metal and piping collapsed and fell towards the stormtroopers… and in dropped the ship.

_He came back… You came back._

**_Of course I did._ **

The troopers were brutally crushed by the fallen ceiling and the ship levitated above the wreckage, low enough for Maul to jump out and run towards her.

“What are you doing?!” she yelled at him over the loud explosions and flames. “I did this so you two could get _away,_ not so that you could come back and get killed!”

“And what about you?!” he roared back, standing toe to toe with her. “Was this your plan all along, bury your clones in the ground, throw away your lightsabers and then die _here?!_ Here of all places?! I won’t stand for it!”

“No, I didn’t have a plan!” Ahsoka shouted. They could hear more troopers on their way, their march was deafening. “I never did, not like you! I told you to take Rex and go!”

Maul took her by the shoulders and looked at her with fury and desperation. “Don't be foolish by sacrificing yourself so easily! You _must_ survive! You want to know why I came back for you on the Star Destroyer? I will tell you! I was so fixed on saving myself and I was prepared to leave without sparing another thought for you! But a feeling came to me so strongly, I knew it was the Force, for I could not ignore it. It was guiding me, telling me to return, that is why! I came back for you because I was told to save you even though I didn’t want to! But now I want to. I _want_ to save you, Ahsoka, I want you to live, so stop arguing with me and come along! Your friend is waiting for you!”

A warm sensation bloomed in Ahsoka’s chest, filled with hope and… something else because of this man in front of her, this warrior who used to be a Sith, who was holding onto her and looking into her eyes with fear and longing because he wanted her to _survive_.

And now she knew she could.

She nodded to him and tossed him her lightsaber once more. They took out as many incoming troopers as they could while making their way into the ship. Ahsoka hopped into the pilot’s seat and lifted them off while Maul redirected the remaining blasts away before closing the door.

When they were finally out of the planet’s atmosphere, Ahsoka looked over at Rex in the seat next to her. He was unconscious and he’d feel a lot of pain in his leg when he awoke, but he was alive.

Ahsoka exhaled and fell back into the seat. She turned to see where Maul was. He was staring out one of the window’s in the lobby. He caught her staring and she cleared her throat.

“I guess… we’re going to another planet.”

He nodded wordlessly and took a seat, then closed his eyes. He looked tired and not in the mood to speak; Ahsoka felt the exact same way at the moment. She faced the front of the ship and pulled up a holomap to look for the nearest inhabitable planet. Before they arrived at Nimzii, she was worried what was going to happen to them, how they would work things out. Now that feeling had increased tenfold, because things were so much more different now. They’d have to watch their backs a lot more closely and it made Ahsoka more anxious than ever.

But it wasn’t just that. She could _feel_ something else, feel that things weren’t the same between her and Maul anymore. Ever since the first time she met him, she knew: things were going to change for them forever.

* * *

They ended up settling for an old space station that still remained out of the Empire’s control―for now, at least. They had to move swiftly. Maul slung one of Rex’s arms over his shoulder while Ahsoka opened the ship’s door for them and ran to find a medical droid.

The one she came across happily obliged and got to work on Rex’s leg right away while assuring her and Maul that he’d be just fine.

“Thank you,” Ahsoka told the droid. In the back of the tiny hospital room, Maul was once again silent, arms crossed as he leaned against the wall. She tried to make eye contact with him but his eyes were closed.

The next morning Rex was already in top shape. Maul had left the room momentarily, so Ahsoka was left to check in on him.

“How are you feeling?” she asked as Rex stretched his legs.

“A lot better,” he assured her. “Say, I was thinking, uh… I’m going to walk around a bit. I promise not to go too far. There’s just something I need to find out, is all.”

“Of course,” she told him, though she was a little concerned. There was that look on his face again since the big crash, but she knew he needed to do whatever it was on his own. “I’m glad you guys came back,” she offered apologetically with a half-hearted smile.

“Well, it was all him, really,” Rex said. “I was out cold most of the time.”

“Are you sure?” Her smile grew and she raised an eyebrow. “You didn’t convince him to come back for me?” But she already knew the answer.

“No,” he answered, shaking his head. “He did that all on his own. Everytime I think I’ve got him figured out, he continues to surprise me.”

“Yeah,” Ahsoka said quietly. “He sure does.”

Rex wasn’t gone long at all it turned out. By the time Ahsoka was able to track down Maul at the back of the hospital, Rex had arrived with big news as Ahsoka divided their share of credits for the last time.

“So,” he began, a little nervous, rubbing a hand behind his neck. “I’ve bartered with a couple of tradesmen. They offered passage in exchange for a bit of work.” He looked to Ahsoka. “I know it’s not ideal, but they’re very discreet. The thing is, I’d been thinking about this for a few days and… I can’t be the only clone out there who made it out of Order 66. I need to find them and help them. I can’t abandon my brothers.”

Ahsoka smiled. “I understand, Rex.”

He looked ashamed. “I’m sorry I didn’t say anything earlier, kid. I’ve told them to save room for―” he glanced at Maul. “Two more people, if needed.”

Ahsoka shook her head and put a hand on his shoulder. “I know this is something you need to do on your own, Rex. Really, I know.”

He smiled sadly at her, then they both looked at Maul.

“A generous offer,” he said, and his tone was sincere. “But I have other plans.”

They walked with him to where his transport waited for him at the space station’s enormous hangar bay, ready to go. Ahsoka hugged Rex and he returned the embrace tightly.

“Take care of yourself, kid,” he whispered to her, voice trembling. “Promise you will.”

“Only if you do as well,” she whispered back, her eyes watering.

Rex let go and nodded. “Maul,” he acknowledged, holding out his hand.

Maul was surprised at first. “Farewell, Commander Rex,” he said, and he took his arm firmly in respect.

Rex waved one last goodbye and then he was gone. _I’ll see him again,_ Ahsoka thought, determined. _I will see you again, my friend. I believe that._

“It is a noble cause,” Maul commented. “To be looking for his brothers.” She watched his expression; he must have been thinking of Savage in that moment. He caught her looking at him again. “So,” he spoke up.

“So,” she returned.

“It is just you and I once more.”

“It is.”

“What will you do next?”

“Are you going to offer me to join you again?” she joked.

He pretended to contemplate, as if really considering it, but she already knew what he was going to say. “No, I am not. As you said, our goals are different. You cannot come with me, and…” he looked a little sad. “Whatever it is you choose to do for yourself, I cannot interfere.”

She nodded, looking around the hangar. “I don’t know what I’m going to do next,” she admitted, then looked down at her feet. “I still have enough credits to buy a small ship, so I guess I’ll have to see where things go from there.”

“You don’t want to take the one from Nimzii?” he asked.

She looked up at him and pretended to grimace. “Not really my style of transportation.” But she was no longer in a joking mood.

He nodded. “Ah.” She watched as he went for his belt that still contained her short lightsaber and examined it. “Your master made this for you, didn’t he? It is well made, for the most part.” Ahsoka rolled her eyes. “I have not hated wielding it. Do take good care of it.” He gestured for her to take it.

She looked down at the weapon, then up at him. Then she gently put her hand over his so that his fingers closed around the saber. “I don’t know how long I’ll be keeping this one,” she said, referring to the one still hooked to her belt. “I’ve cherished it, but it’s from a life I’ve left behind. This one here, though,” she squeezed his hand slightly. “I’d like you to have it.”

He met her gaze, eyes wide. “But this lightsaber is your life.”

She took a step forward. “I know,” was all she answered, all she could say for now.

He returned the weapon to his belt, then looked into her eyes. There was something behind them, something she was afraid to recognize or acknowledge, and he was afraid, just like her. He released a small sigh, took her hand in his and brought it to his lips, kissing the knuckles lightly. “It was an honor, Lady Tano.”

When he let her go, she turned and walked away from him. There was a pain in her heart, a longing, and she could feel that it was coming from the both of them.

“Ahsoka,” he called to her.

She turned back to him swiftly. The sad look in his eyes returned, but he smiled gently.

“Perhaps one of these days… you and I will cross paths again.”

“I sure hope not,” she said, but she knew she didn’t mean it, and by the way he looked at her and laughed softly to himself, he knew it, too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was so much fun to write! I'd finally caught up with The Clone Wars and finished season 7 a couple of days ago. Since then, the finale is ALL I'VE BEEN ABLE TO THINK ABOUT, and I've been reading every maulsoka fic I can get my hands on!
> 
> And I just want to quickly add that I am not trying to undermine Ahsoka's decision of leaving her lightsabers behind in anyway in the show. I totally understand why she did it and support her completely, but just for the sake of this story, I decided to change it up a bit! ;)  
> Also, something that I've always wanted for Maul was to really acknowledge Savage's death and how much it hurt him and changed him. After Palpatine killed Savage, we never really got to see how that affected Maul while he continued to rule Mandalore and I think it was more subtext than anything.  
> Lastly, in this alternate take, I like to think that both Maul and Ahsoka could begin their journeys in finding their true selves, and eventually live fulfilling lives :) I think everyone deserves a happy ending, and I'm rooting for them!!
> 
> Thank you so much for reading! <3
> 
> EDIT: I've recently found this song, "La Lune" by Billie Marten, and I think it fits the ending of this story quite well and really gets me in the mood. You can listen to it [here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZPTRHYip-AQ), and the slowed version is beautiful as well :)


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I wasn't planning on continuing this story, but you know what why not, let's go for it!! I had a lot of fun writing these characters and I'm ready to have another go and make one last adventure for these guys! And I decided to make the whole thing 3 chapters overall just because in this 2nd chapter there's a lot of stuff to get through and the word count was a lot larger than expected, so please bear with me!
> 
> And thank you so much for the wonderful comments!! They really made my day and encouraged me to keep writing! Because of that, I spent a lot of time developing this new arc for Ahsoka and Maul, and this is the most excited and proudest I've felt about anything I've ever written, so thank you for the inspiration!
> 
> Now let's get to it!!

Ahsoka didn’t think it would be so hard to say goodbye to Maul. She didn’t know, couldn’t decide if he was an enemy, a friend or something else, but there were several moments in the space station when she wanted to turn back around and ask him to come with her. Even if he was still set on going back to his Crimson Dawn and Shadow Collective, maybe he’d hold off on joining them for a while, maybe she’d even come see what it was like to be a part of his operation…

But her legs kept moving in the same direction as when she walked away from him. Her body seemed to be on autopilot, moving without a second thought towards her unknown destination. She kept telling herself, _No, it’s too late. He’s left already, and you need to leave, too._

So she bought some food and supplies, purchased a small two-passenger ship, roared up the engines and took off into space.

When all she could see of the station was a tiny speck in the inky blackness of space, she whispered, “Goodbye,” realizing she had never said it to Maul in person. What was he doing at this moment? Was he still standing in that same spot? Was he thinking of her as much as she was thinking of him?

The tightness in her chest returned, and it was stronger than ever. She shook her head and refocused on flying. Rex was finding his own path and looking for his brothers, Maul would be going back to doing what he did best, and now it was Ahsoka’s time to search for her own destiny.

* * *

THREE YEARS LATER

“So much for finding my own destiny,” Ahsoka grumbled as she drew her cloak tighter around herself. She crouched behind a large, icy wall, waiting for the opportune moment to slip past the stormtroopers. It had only been a few hours since she’d arrived on the planet Ilun, and she already wanted to leave. She remembered coming here as a padawan to get her first kyber crystal, and then years later when she accompanied a group with Master Yoda. It still pained her to think about that time, her time as a Jedi. She felt like a completely different person sometimes whenever she reminisced about her old life.

And sometimes she felt like the exact same person. For instance, she had the same sour attitude in this moment like when she first set foot on Ilun. She was never a fan of the cold. But really, she’d grown since she left the Jedi Order. She was older, and she liked to think―wiser. Her head tails almost reached her waist and her montrals were a few inches taller. She wiped her nose with her glove and surveyed the area one more time.

The Empire had taken over Ilun since the fall of the Republic. A battalion of stormtroopers were stationed at the entrance of the ominous cave where Jedi used to enter, and they’d been here for a few weeks, by the looks of it. She remembered that every nineteen days, the cave would freeze over and it wasn’t uncommon for padawans to come back later if they were unsuccessful on their first try, but the troopers were impatient. They continuously hacked away at the ice to keep the entrance open and retrieve the crystals. In just the few hours that Ahsoka had been on Ilun, they’d already collected hundreds of them. It wasn’t right and made her so angry that it was her rage alone that kept her from freezing on the spot.

She wasn’t planning on doing anything with the troopers when she arrived; she didn’t even know they were here. Originally, she was headed for this planet because she wanted to get kyber crystals of her own and forge new lightsabers. She still kept the one that Anakin had given her (securely hidden in her ship) and started carrying a blaster around, but it was time to have her own weapons again. She wasn’t exactly sure what had become of the other one that she gave away, three years ago…

No. Now was not the time to be thinking of that. She kept her eyes on the stormtroopers; the two that were guarding the entrance seemed relaxed enough.

With their backs turned momentarily, Ahsoka hopped up from behind the wall and crouched low to the ground, crawling near to the entrance and making as little noise as possible. A trooper coughed suddenly and she nearly had a heart attack.

“Oi,” another said and Ahsoka froze. He was about to turn around…!

“You okay?” he continued, asking the trooper who had just coughed. Ahsoka’s blood felt even icier but she relaxed a little, still undetected.

“Yeah,” the trooper answered. “It’s this bloody weather. I think I’m coming down with the cold. Why do the snowtroopers get better clothes than us?”

“Because they’re called _snowtroopers._ ”

“I know that, you arse. I just think they should’ve given us thicker armor or something,” he complained. “Or make it thermal or whatever.”

“Well, BK-3138 made some hot stew a while ago if you wanna have some, it’ll help, I’m sure,” the other one suggested.

“That sounds really good. Hopefully that little rat hasn’t eaten it yet.”

“Nah, we haven’t given her a bite since she got here. She’s too fussy.”

Ahsoka’s brow furrowed as she finally slipped into the entrance. There was someone here, a girl? What the hell was a girl doing on this freezing planet? Was she younger than Ahsoka? Were they neglecting her? That made her fury even stronger. After Ahsoka got her kyber crystals she’d have a look around, she decided.

The icy tunnels seemed to be a lot smaller than she remembered, or maybe that was only because they were bigger when she was a child. She took a deep breath and went deeper in, letting her instincts guide her, mind blank and listening.

She thought having no direction in mind was a good plan as she looked for the crystals, but the cave seemed to think otherwise. Having no direction in mind really _meant_ she was going in no direction. She couldn’t tell if she was going farther inside the cave or back towards the exit, if she was going in circles and coming back to the same set of tunnels or if it just looked the same, and after ten minutes of this and coming across two tunnels that she could’ve sworn she’d seen before, she began to feel frustrated.

Feeling frustrated then made her annoyed with herself because Master Yoda would tell her frustration would not help her, that she only needed to follow her Jedi instincts. Then she began to doubt herself. She was no longer a Jedi, after all. She didn’t know what she was. Perhaps the cave felt her self-doubt, recognized that she was no longer a Jedi and was rejecting her, refusing to let her take any crystals.

She sighed and did the most natural thing she could think of: sit and meditate. The ground was freezing against her legs but she tried to ignore it.

“Please,” she said to no one in particular, closing her eyes. “Show me the way. What am I supposed to look for?” _I’ll be patient,_ she thought. _I can be patient, I really can._

But a minute had already gone by and she couldn’t wait any longer. She opened her eyes and looked around, expecting to see some sort of sign, but not a single thing about the tunnel she was in had changed. How much longer was she supposed to wait?

“Please,” she repeated. “I need to get those crystals.” She waited, hoping for a response.

Again, the air was still.

“Come on!” she protested, her hands balled into fists. “I know I’m supposed to listen to my instincts and everything, but I really can’t do that right now! There’s someone outside who needs my help!” She gestured behind her, even though she wasn’t sure if that way was the exit. “They could be hurting her, and I’m running out of time! Please, show me and then I can go and help her!”

Then, she got a feeling. It wasn't very strong and it was possible that she was just imagining it, but a tiny feeling told her to go down the left tunnel. Hoping it was the right one, she stood and followed the feeling. She made her mind blank once more and felt the prompt grow stronger and stronger, leading her down a series of icy hallways until finally… _finally,_ she entered a room. It was small, and had only two kyber crystals in it, peeking out the top of a little ice column. It was almost as if those crystals were meant for her. She plucked them from the ice and held them in her hands.

“Thank you,” she said sincerely, and headed for the exit.

The way back to the entrance of the cave was thankfully short, and Ahsoka was out in no time.

Unfortunately, the two stormtroopers no longer had their backs turned to her and jumped when they saw her, reaching for their blasters.

“Hold it right there!” one of them shouted, aiming his weapon. Ahsoka rolled out of the way, ran towards him and kicked him in the stomach, sending him to the ground. Ducking as the second trooper fired at her, she tripped him with a swipe of her leg. She took out her blaster, permanently set to stun, and aimed it at both of the downed men. Shoving the blaster back onto her belt, she set off for the main camp.

She was able to quietly sneak around the edges after using the Force to cause a line of speeder bikes to fall onto each other, and tried to sense where the prisoner was being held.

 _Where are you?_ she thought desperately. _Don’t worry, I’m on my way._

“Do you think she knocked those speeders over?” a stormtrooper asked the others, looking at the vehicles in confusion.

“Wouldn’t surprise me,” another answered. “She’s been pulling all kinds of magic tricks ever since we found her.”

“The sooner we get her to the Emperor, the better. She freaks me out.”

“Heh, delivering a Force user to him all of a sudden will be a surprise for sure.”

 _She’s Force sensitive?_ Ahsoka thought hopefully. _She might even be a Jedi, I need to get to her_ now. _Come on, where are you?_

She detected a strong wave of fear and confusion coming from one of the tents in the camp. Making use of the stormtroopers’ conversation, she ran from behind them and snuck into the tent.

The prisoner was not a Jedi, but a little Pantoran girl. She was gagged, bound to a wooden post with durasteel cuffs, yellow eyes blinking up at Ahsoka in surprise. Her blue skin with yellow-marked cheeks were stained with tears, but her purple hair and regal clothing were still very neat, so she must not have been imprisoned for very long, thankfully.

Ahsoka raised her hands, knelt in front of the girl and said, “It’s okay, little one. I’m here to help, my name is Ahsoka. I need you to keep quiet, okay?” The girl nodded and Ahsoka carefully removed the gag from her mouth.

“Are you here to rescue me?” she whispered, scared but hopeful. Ahsoka smiled warmly.

“Yes,” she said, and she used the Force to undo the cuffs. “What’s your name?”

“Chisé.” Chisé stared at Ahsoka in awe. “How did you _do_ that? Are you Jedi?”

“I’ll explain later, come with me.” She took Chisé’s hand and they exited out the back of the tent―

―and were met by a group of stormtroopers.

“Hands up!”

Ahsoka wrapped an arm around Chisé, ducked, and used her free hand to reach for her blaster.

“Run!” she told her, letting her go. “Run up the hill, go!” Chisé obeyed and bolted. Ahsoka managed to stun a few of the troopers, but not before one of them grazed her elbow with blasterfire. She grunted in pain and stunned the rest of them, then ran behind Chisé.

“Keep going, I have a ship up ahead!” Ahsoka called to her. More troopers were coming. She turned around briefly and fired a few more shots, not checking to see if they landed on their targets.

The two made it inside Ahsoka’s ship and they were out of the planet’s atmosphere in no time. Ahsoka made sure Chisé was buckled in properly before asking, “Are you alright? Are you hurt?”

She shook her head no. “But I am hungry.”

Ahsoka smiled and got her a ration stick for her to munch on. “How old are you?”

“Eight years old,” Chisé mumbled, eyes to the floor.

“And… your parents?” Ahsoka asked, fearing the answer.

The little girl’s eyes watered and tears dripped onto the floor as she continued to eat. “We were at a terminal, about to get onto a ship. I accidentally moved one of our bags with my mind…” she sniffed. “There were those soldiers walking around and they saw me…” She looked up at Ahsoka, crying. “I didn’t mean to move it, it was an accident, I swear! And now my mom and dad…”

Ahsoka knelt on the hard floor of the cockpit and took Chisé in her arms, giving her a hug. Chisé buried her face into Ahsoka’s shirt, tears, snot and food getting everywhere, but Ahsoka didn’t mind.

“They’re dead,” Chisé continued, her voice muffled. “They killed them right in front of me.”

Ahsoka tried to comfort her; this poor girl was only eight years and had just lost her parents. She held her close and stroked her hair until Chisé fell asleep. The ship didn’t have much room and the passenger’s seat wasn’t very plush, but Ahsoka used her one blanket and tried to make her as comfortable as possible while she slept.

When she was sure Chisé was secure in her seat, Ahsoka applied a bacta patch to the blaster wound on her elbow and sat back in her own, looking out the front window of the ship. What was she going to do now? Chisé was now an orphan, but she couldn’t take care of her. She didn’t have the means. Even if the Emperor had no idea she existed, it was still very likely those stormtroopers were going to be on the lookout for her. Ahsoka could look after her for a little while, but Chisé needed a home, not a babysitter. Ahsoka was disappointed in herself that she wouldn’t be able to care for this girl.

She sighed and picked up her small holoprojector. She pressed a button and a blue, transparent face appeared.

“Hey, you got a second? I need to talk.”

* * *

Even since the escape from Nimzii, Ahsoka had been on the run for three whole years. She could never stop in one place for too long, as it worried her to no end that the stormtroopers would recognize her or that there’d be a bounty on her head. There were even a couple of times she was sure that was the case; a trooper would glance at her for a second too long, or the people she walked by would be acting suspiciously. Perhaps she was being paranoid, but it was always better to be safe than sorry.

It’d been years since she last went to Florrum, when Captain Hondo Ohnaka had taken her captive. The place had changed a lot; the planet was no longer ruled by pirates, as Hondo’s gang had been dissolved shortly after the Empire took over.

“This place can be dangerous,” Ahsoka told Chisé as she draped a cloak over her shoulders. She kneeled and adjusted the hood to cover her head. “You’ll need to be quiet and not speak or look at anyone, okay? Can you do that for me?” Chisé nodded, eager to please her rescuer. They held hands as they exited the ship, heading for a cantina. It was a rowdy place with loud and violent people, and Chisé clung to Ahsoka’s arm for safety.

Ahsoka glanced around the establishment. There was smoke everywhere and it was hard to see at first. Then, she saw a figure sitting in the back, hunched in a corner and taking small sips from a drink. He grimaced at the taste, but kept his eyes down. Ahsoka squeezed Chisé’s hand in reassurance and they made their way to the figure. He immediately looked up with his warm brown eyes and smiled.

“Hello, Rex,” Ahsoka greeted, returning the smile.

“Hey, kid,” Rex said as he rose, taking her into a big hug. Due to his accelerated aging, Rex now had more lines on his face, strong crinkles at the corners of his eyes and he’d grown out his bleached hair to his natural black locks, which had the beginnings of gray streaks in them.

“I told you not to call me kid, anymore,” Ahsoka scolded him half-heartedly.

“Yeah, whatever you say, kid.” He grinned at her and looked at Chisé. “Lovely to meet you, miss. I’m Rex.”

“Hi…” Chisé responded shyly and they shook hands.

“Have a seat, Ahsoka, and let’s talk.”

Ahsoka let Chisé slide into the booth first before taking a seat herself.

“It’s risky for us to be meeting up like this,” Rex warned her.

“I know. Thank you for coming, really.”

“And what's that patch on your elbow? Did you get into more trouble?”

She waved her hand. “I’m fine. Listen,” she leaned forward, resting her elbows on the table. “Last time we talked, you told me you were headed for Seelos with some other clones.”

“That’s right,” Rex said proudly with a grin. “A few of us are hunkered down over there. It’s a hot desert with some nasty predators, but it’s home.”

“That’s good,” she said, glancing at Chisé with a smile. “Some stormtroopers were after Chisé because she’s a Force wielder,” her tone quieted to a whisper. “I can barely keep myself safe, can I depend on you to look after her?”

Rex’s grin disappeared into an expression of concern. He looked at Chisé, who was slurping on some noodles they’d ordered. “Poor thing. Must have been hell for her.” He looked to Ahsoka again. “I’m sorry, kid… I’m not the guy you’re looking for.”

“What? Why not? Is everything okay on Seelos?”

“A group of us regs gathered together is risky enough, I won’t lie to you. We have to watch our backs every second. If we took on a child, a child with _Force_ capabilities no less, I’m afraid we’d be putting ourselves and her at a lot of risk.”

Ahsoka leaned back in her seat. “I figured you might say that, but I had to try. Please don’t feel sorry, I completely understand.” She sighed and glanced around the cantina. “But I can’t take her back to Ilun, Rex, they’re tearing that place apart and I couldn’t do anything about it.” Her hands curled into fists. “What am I going to do? I need to protect her.” They both looked at Chisé, who’d finished her food and was slurping on a drink. Ahsoka knew that Chisé could understand what they were talking about; she wasn’t naive. She knew the situation was serious, she just didn’t know how to show that she knew.

“If it’s protection you’re looking for…” Rex began, stroking his chin. “There aren’t many powerful people left in the galaxy who can offer what you’re looking for. That is,” he looked serious. “Only one person comes to mind.”

Ahsoka’s heart rate quickened. She knew who he was talking about, of course she did.

_Maul._

A flood of memories came rushing back: Maul coming back to the Star Destroyer, helping them bury the clones, fighting back-to-back in the alleyway, when he came back a _second_ time for her, grabbing her by the shoulders and telling her he wanted her to survive. And finally, the sad goodbye they shared on the space station, when he took her hand and kissed it, hoping they’d cross paths again.

“I… I don’t know,” Ahsoka faltered, looking away. “It’s been a long time; I haven’t contacted him, nor has he contacted me. He probably doesn’t even remember m―remember us.”

“I seriously doubt that, Ahsoka.” Rex raised an eyebrow at her, but the corner of his mouth lifted.

“The Shadow Collective is a group of very powerful people, fine,” Ahsoka said, folding her arms. “But they’re also _dangerous._ And Maul is their leader. Just because we teamed up with him one time, it doesn’t mean he’s going to help us.”

“Honestly, I think it’s worth a shot.”

She thought for a moment. If she came to Maul and told him her situation, would he help her and Chisé? Would he be willing to take her under his wing and provide protection? She hoped that he’d be willing to at least listen to her. They’d parted on good terms, and it was a painful parting, after all they’d been through. She knew he was feeling it at the time, too. But what if he was a different person now? If he was back to leading the Shadow Collective, if he was back to being “Lord Maul”, how would he react upon seeing her?

Something inside her, the Force, told her to take a leap of faith, to have hope. Ahsoka took a deep breath and nodded.

“Alright, I’ll give it a shot.”

“Where are you going to start?”

“I’m not sure,” she confessed. “I’ve hardly heard any news about any of the Shadow Collective members, only that Crimson Dawn has a new figurehead, Dryden Vos, though I’m sure Maul is operating everything behind the scenes.” Ahsoka considered for a moment. “I’d need to talk to one of them first.”

“You could try the Pykes.”

Ahsoka made a face. “I don’t think so. I’ve had dealings with them before, and they won’t want to see me again, and the feeling’s mutual.” Then she had an idea. “Is Hondo still here on Florrum?”

“He is,” Rex answered, and he smiled. “To be honest, kid, when you called to meet up, I suggested this planet because I had a feeling you were up to something, and might need someone to turn to.”

“Hondo is one of the last people I’d want to turn to right now,” Ahsoka glowered. “But he has a lot of knowledge about the black market and dirty business. And I know for a fact that he’s come across Maul before. I’ll go see if he has any information.”

Rex agreed to watch Chisé while Ahsoka went to see Hondo. It didn’t take long to find him, as he was still living in the same fortress-like residence, but it was a lot emptier now. There were no pirates, no customers at the bar. The only living things to greet her were Hondo himself and his little monkey-lizard, Pikk, who screeched when he saw her.

“Now _this_ is a surprise!” Hondo cackled as he saw Ahsoka approach his home. “Shouldn’t you be dead? I heard they were executing all the Jedi three years ago.”

“Long story that you don’t deserve to hear,” she snarled at him. “I have some questions for you, and you’re going to answer them.”

“What, no Kenobi and Skywalker to chaperone you?”

She took out her blaster and held it up to his neck. “Don’t you dare,” she said with gritted teeth.

The humor faded from his eyes and he turned somber. “Very well, m’lady. Right this way.”

They sat at an old battered table while Hondo poured her a glass which she did not touch.

“So tell me,” he said, after gulping down his own glass. “Was Order 66 really as bad as they say?”

“Yeah,” Ahsoka said, her anger fading as she looked around the empty building. “It was. What have you been doing here?”

“I’m afraid pirating is a lost art now,” Hondo answered with distaste, pouring himself some more of the drink. “I’ve all but lost my business. I’m just a small-time smuggler now.” He looked so pitiful, Ahsoka would have felt sorry for him if she didn’t despise him so much. “I remember the last time I saw you, you were with a group of little wannabe Jedi.” He looked at her carefully. “Do you know what became of them?”

“No,” she answered regretfully. “I left the Jedi Order before it all went down. Those kids are probably…” She couldn’t finish the sentence.

“Very well,” he seemed satisfied with her answer. “They were good kids.” He raised his glass. “To them and them only.”

 _What the hell,_ Ahsoka thought and they tapped their glasses together. He laughed as she downed the whole thing and almost retched. She’d had alcohol once before and hated it; perhaps it was an acquired taste.

“Now, Miss Ahsoka, what can I help you with?” he asked before taking another sip.

“I’m looking for Maul.”

Hondo nearly spat out his drink. He coughed and pounded on his chest and Pikk hissed. Hondo squinted his eyes at her. “Maul? _The_ Darth Maul?”

“He doesn’t go by that title anymore.”

“Why the _hell_ are you looking for him?”

“None of your business, that’s why,” Ahsoka retorted. “You’ve met him before, haven’t you?”

“Not by choice,” he said. “He tried to make my men join him, he and his crazy brother.”

Ahsoka’s jaw dropped. “You knew Savage?”

“Again, not by choice. He was twice as big as Maul, a monster of a thing.” He stared into his drink. “Darth Maul and Savage Oppress, the two _Nightbrothers,_ ” he scoffed. “I had never met anyone as mad as they were.”

“Savage is dead,” she told him. “He was killed a while back.”

“Huh. Good riddance.”

Ahsoka pursed her lips, not sure how to respond to that.

“Anyway, I’m looking for Maul,” she continued. “I figured you had some information on him or any of his followers.”

“Ah yes, the _Shadow Collective,_ ” Hondo drawled. “ _Very_ intimidating names―Crimson Dawn, Black Sun, Pyke Syndicate, to name a few.”

“I need to find him,” Ahsoka pressed. “It’s important. Tell me what you know.”

“Hm.” He raised an eyebrow at her. “Are you trying to capture or kill him?”

“Neither.”

“Then I can’t help you,” he got up and Pikk jumped onto his shoulder. “Unless you’re trying to inflict damage upon him and his rats, I won’t give you any information.”

“So if I’d lied, you would have helped me?”

Hondo laughed and shook his head. “You’re too honest, Tano. Tell me why you need him, and then I’ll tell you what I know.”

“I need protection from him,” she answered reluctantly.

“Are you being hunted?”

“No, not me. Someone else.”

Hondo narrowed his eyes, but slowly sat back down. “And what makes you think he will help you? Are you going to make a deal with him? I’d rather make a deal with the Emperor.”

“It’s a long story,” Ahsoka said, waving a hand. “One that I really don’t have time to recap for you.”

“Ah, so you two _know_ each other.” He stroked his chin. “Very interesting.”

She rolled her eyes. “You make it sound like it was something bad.”

“No, not something bad. I think… something good?”

Ahsoka hated that she was blushing. It was ridiculous how easily Hondo could get under her skin. He laughed again.

“Your silence says it all. Don’t worry, I won’t pry any further. Your reaction is amusing to me, so I will help you.” He downed the last of his drink. “I actually did some business with Crimson Dawn within the last year.”

“With Dryden Vos?” she asked, narrowing her eyes. “He _works_ for Maul, and you were just talking about how much you hated him.”

“Hey, money wins over morality,” he said with a shrug. “He’s actually a pretty pleasant fellow. A snake to be sure, but on the outside he’s not so bad. You get to Vos, you get to Maul.”

“Okay.” Ahsoka allowed herself to feel some hope. “So where can I find Vos?”

“He’s famous for owning the biggest yacht in the galaxy, it’s a Kalevalan yacht called the _First Light,_ ” Hondo explained. “It goes from planet to planet, doing whatever shady business Crimson Dawn does these days. The last I heard, the _First Light_ was orbiting Kessel. Or was it Tatooine? No, it was definitely Kessel.”

“You’re not sending me on a wild goose chase, are you, Hondo?” Ahsoka asked, getting ready to leave. She stood and stared at him, arms folded. He smiled at her genuinely this time.

“I may still be a pirate, my dear, but I respect you too much to waste your time. Good luck, I hope you find him.”

* * *

Ahsoka gave Rex one last hug before she and Chisé boarded the ship.

“I’ll see you soon,” Rex said.

“Hopefully not too soon,” Ahsoka responded with a sad smile. “Otherwise that means something has gone wrong again.”

“You take care of Ahsoka, now, understand?” Rex asked Chisé, crouching to her eye level and saluting her.

“Yes, sir!” Chisé saluted back and he ruffled her hair. She bounded happily onto the ship.

“She likes you,” Ahsoka commented with a smile as she watched her.

“She likes you a lot more,” he said. “She was telling me how amazing you are, and how much she wants to be just like you.” He tilted his head so Ahsoka caught his eye. “You ought to teach her some of that Jedi stuff, you know. She won’t be able to find another teacher besides you.”

“I don’t know,” she said, uncertain, her smile faded. “I’ve never had an apprentice before, I never even reached the rank of Jedi Master.”

“In my experience, rank never made anyone a good soldier. It’s who they really are that matters. Take Anakin, for example.” They both shared a sad smile and painful memories. “Whatever doubts you have about yourself, Ahsoka, whether about being a Jedi, or if it’s something else…” Ahsoka’s thoughts immediately went to Maul in that moment. “I hope you find a way to find out who you really are. I’m not a soldier anymore, and neither are you. I’m Rex, you’re Ahsoka Tano. I hope you can find out what that means to you.”

Ahsoka got into her ship, somehow feeling refreshed and determined.

“Where are we going now?” Chisé asked, buckling herself in.

“Kessel,” Ahsoka answered as she started the engines. “We’re going to see if we can find Maul.”

And so they were off. Ahsoka started the hyperdrive and saw that they wouldn’t get to Kessel until several hours. She saw Chisé rubbing her eyes tiredly and Ahsoka smiled. It’d been a long day for the young girl, she couldn’t blame her for wanting some rest. Putting the blanket over her again and heading back to the pilot seat, Ahsoka finally had a moment to attempt forging her new lightsaber. She took out the two kyber crystals and spread the parts to make the saber onto the ship’s console. Using the Force, she pieced the puzzles together, putting the field conductor here, inserting the power cell there…

She thought she had both sabers assembled, and when she clicked the buttons to turn them on, she even saw a flicker of light and sparks fly off the ends. But just as it quickly started to work, both sabers completely fell apart, the pieces scattering all of the floor. Ahsoka clenched her teeth, hoping the noise didn’t wake Chisé. She picked them up and sighed in frustration. She’d never had this much trouble making her own lightsaber before. What was wrong?

She put the parts away into a compartment on the ship and took a seat again. She folded her arms and closed her eyes, thinking. Had she picked the wrong kyber crystals? No, that couldn’t be it. The path was shown to her on Ilun, those crystals were unmistakably meant for her. Perhaps she’d done something wrong with the assembly, but she couldn’t imagine what.

Meditating on her troubles, Ahsoka found herself drifting off. She was in that stage of half-sleep, where she could feel the worn cloth of the pilot seat and hear the whir of the hyperdrive, but her mind was in a faraway place.

It flew lightyears away from the ship, past countless stars and planets, and finally reached a blue and green world. There was so much water, a giant beautiful ocean that took up at least 80% of the planet. Ahsoka could even feel the gentle breeze and smell the salty air. She came to an island, a beautiful island that she’d never seen before. There were small stone buildings and steps; ancient, but clearly recently used and lived in. Ahsoka furrowed her brow, trying to focus more. Where was this place? It was so peaceful, she never wanted to leave.

 _I want to be there,_ she thought as her mind explored the island. _I want to be here._

**_Me, too._ **

Ahsoka’s eyes shot wide open. She was back in her ship, facing the front, watching the blurry and blue visuals of lightspeed race by. She rubbed her eyes. Who spoke to her? Already, the voice was fading. She knew she recognized it, but now she forgot what it sounded like. The image of the island was also disappearing before her eyes and she couldn’t reach out to grasp it.

She let her eyes drift shut again to get some much-needed sleep. She hoped it wouldn’t be the last time she saw that island.

* * *

“Wow,” Chisé called out in admiration as they approached Dryden Vos’s yacht. The _First Light_ was certainly a sight to behold; Ahsoka had never seen anything like it. Here was a ship that a man lived and operated in at all times, the headquarters of one of the most dangerous organizations in the galaxy.

“Let’s hope Maul is in there,” Ahsoka muttered and Chisé nodded. She turned on her communications. “This is Ahsoka Tano, requesting to board the _First Light._ ”

“State your business,” a voice answered.

“I’m here to speak with Dryden Vos. I have a mutual acquaintance.”

“Proceed.”

She and Chisé exchanged looks with each other, and she steered the ship towards the yacht’s hangar. As soon as they landed, Chisé was ready to open the door.

“Just a second, Chisé,” Ahsoka told her. She opened one of the metal plates in the floor, lifted it and took out a small parcel.

“Can I see?” Chisé asked in amazement, already guessing what it was. Ahsoka showed her, opening the parcel and revealing the lightsaber. “Wow…” She stared at it with wide, yellow eyes.

“Hopefully I won’t have to use it,” Ahsoka said, hooking it to her belt. She’d been a lot more careful about hiding her identity since Nimzii, but she saw no point in hiding it from Dryden Vos. If he took her to Maul, everything would be fine. If not, she would need to protect herself and Chisé. She nodded to the young girl to open the door, and when they stepped out, they were immediately med by a dozen armed guards, wearing black flowing robes and shiny black masks.

Ahsoka sighed. The latter it was. She raised her lightsabers as they fired. Chisé screamed and crouched as the blasts came towards them, but Ahsoka deflected them all, redirecting them onto the shiny floor and golden ceiling. _This trip was a waste of time,_ she thought irritably.

“Hold your fire!” someone shouted. A tall man dressed in all black walked swiftly towards them, and the guards lowered their weapons. Ahsoka helped Chisé up and stood in front of her as the man approached. He was tall, with blonde hair and red lines that marked his face, as if his skin had been put back together piece by piece. “What did she say her name was?” he asked one of the guards. “What did you say your name was?” He turned to her quickly.

“Ahsoka Tano,” she answered, still standing protectively in front of Chisé, her lightsaber raised.

“My apologies, madam,” he said sincerely, bringing his hands together. “My men are quick to shoot first and ask questions later. I am Dryden Vos,” he introduced himself in a charming voice, but Ahsoka narrowed her eyes. “Might I ask why you are here?”

“I’m looking for your employer,” she answered slowly. “Maul.”

The man nodded, as if her answer confirmed something. “I thought I recognized your name, Lady Tano. Please, right this way.” The guards stepped aside. Ahsoka wrapped an arm around Chisé’s shoulders as they walked past, following the man to a large elevator. “We’ll continue this conversation in my office.”

It didn’t take long for them to get to the top floor of the yacht. The interior of the place somehow seemed bigger on the inside. Vos gestured for them to exit the elevator first and into his office, which was more like a lounge. Expensive-looking sofas, exotic fruits and deserts… it was empty now, but Ahsoka suspected there were many parties held here.

“Anything I can get you?” Vos asked pleasantly, motioning for them to sit. They both shook their heads no.

“Why are you treating us so kindly all of a sudden?” Ahsoka asked suspiciously.

He smiled wanly at her, smoothing back his hair. “Aha, if Lord Maul found out that I had welcomed Lady Tano in a most unpleasant manner, he’d have my head for it.”

“He’s… told you about me?” she asked, surprised.

“On occasion, very briefly, yes.” He sat on the sofa across from them. “Now, you said you were looking for him?”

“Yes, it’s a private matter.”

He nodded again, dropping it. “Very well, no further questions, Lady Tano.”

“And you can stop calling me that,” she added. She hadn’t minded it when Maul called her, but hearing it out of Vos’s mouth just sounded slimy. “Listen, I know this is unexpected, but I really need to speak with him. It’s important.”

“I understand, of course. However, I am afraid Lord Maul is not here, and he is difficult to get in touch with.”

Ahsoka’s heart sank. _I’m about to go to another planet, aren’t I?_

“But he will be here tomorrow.”

And her heart soared once more.

“As it happens, he is arriving for a meeting to discuss some business matters with Crimson Dawn.” That thin smile returned. “You’re in luck.”

“Good,” she nodded. “Thank you.”

“Of course, any friend of Lord Maul’s is a friend of mine.” Vos stood. “I’ll have one of my guards show you where you’ll be staying. We have the most excellent rooms here on the _First Light._ ”

“Thank you,” Ahsoka said again, and she and Chisé went into the elevator again.

“You’re welcome,” he said, watching them until the doors closed.

“He scares me,” Chisé muttered.

“Yeah, I don’t blame you,” Ahsoka said, smiling at her. “Eat as much food as you want, okay? He’s offering us all of the accommodations, I’m sure he won’t mind.”

Chisé giggled and nodded. Then she asked, “Ahsoka, can you please show me how to move things like you do?”

“You mean use the Force.”

“Yes! Rex told me you used to be a Jedi. Everyone thinks the Jedi are bad, but my parents always told me they were good. I want to be a Jedi, Ahsoka, please teach me!”

Ahsoka looked at her in surprise, then her smile returned. “Hm, it’s not easy to be a Jedi, you have to work really hard.”

“I’ll work really hard!”

Her smile widened. “Alright then, from now on, you’ll be my apprentice, my padawan, and you have to refer to me as master, okay?”

“Yes, Master Ahsoka!”

Chisé’s enthusiasm reminded Ahsoka of when she was her age and her heart ached. Her smile grew sad, and Chisé seemed to notice, but she didn’t pry.

“Now, let’s meditate together,” Ahsoka began, sitting on one of the two beds in their suite given to them by Vos.

“But I have so many questions!” Chisé said, hopping onto the bed with her. “Like where do the Jedi come from? Are there bad Jedi? When do I get my own lightsaber?”

Ahsoka laughed. “Patience, my young padawan. I appreciate your enthusiasm, but now we meditate.”

Chisé quickly obeyed, sitting across from her, copying her stance.

“A good place to meditate is always around nature,” Ahsoka continued, closing her eyes. “We’re in space so it’ll be a little more difficult, but for now, just match my breathing and reach out with your feelings.” The young girl was breathing along with her in no time. “How do you feel, Chisé?” she asked after a while.

“Relaxed,” she answered. “Calm and relaxed.”

“Now, repeat after me: I’m one with the Force and the Force is with me. I’m one with the Force and the Force is with me…”

Soon, they were chanting the mantra together, and then Chisé by herself. Ahsoka opened her eyes and beamed at her, a feeling of pride growing in her chest. She was already doing so well.

That was, until Chisé’s eyes burst open.

“Why isn’t your new lightsaber working? And why do you want to find Maul so badly?”

Ahsoka sighed. “What happened to meditating?”

“I’m sorry, I’m trying but it’s all I can think about! Please, just answer those two questions and then I promise to keep meditating!”

Ahsoka frowned. “I thought you were sleeping while I was working on my lightsaber.”

“Sorry, I thought you’d try to hide it if I was awake.”

She was taken aback by that, but then smiled. “Well, you’re not gonna be happy with this answer, but I don’t know why my new lightsaber isn’t working. This is the first time I’ve come across this problem, to be honest with you.”

“Hm,” Chisé thought for a moment. “Maybe you’re distracted? Something is bugging you?”

“That is possible,” Ahsoka said with a nod. “I could very well be distracted, just like how _you_ are distracted from meditating,” she teased, poking Chisé in the nose, who batted her finger away with a grin.

“Okay, okay, last question: why did you want to find Maul so badly?”

“To find protection for you, you know this already.”

“I know, I know that. But is he your boyfriend?”

Ahsoka didn’t know whether to laugh or hide her face in embarrassment. “How―how do you even know that word? You’re only eight years old.”

“I know a lot of words!” she defended, crossing her arms. “Like boyfriend, girlfriend, damn, hell, shi―”

“O-o-okay,” Ahsoka stopped her there. “I’ll answer your question, and then we keep meditating.”

Chisé nodded excitedly and grabbed a pillow, hugging it to her chest. It made Ahsoka laugh and shake her head.

“I met Maul three years ago on a planet called Mandalore,” she began. “We… didn’t get along at the time, but we eventually became friends.” It was strange, simplifying her relationship with Maul for a child. It seemed to make everything that happened between her and Maul a lot less complicated, somehow. “We fought some bad guys together, I saved his life and he saved my life. That’s it.”

“That’s it? I thought he was your boyfriend!”

“I never said that!” Ahsoka protested, then wondered why she was arguing about such a thing. “He was my friend, and I still hope that we’re friends. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen him, so… we really won’t know until tomorrow.”

“Hm, okay,” Chisé said with a shrug, suddenly dropping the subject. She set the pillow aside and closed her eyes, resuming her meditation.

“Chisé?” Ahsoka asked, a little apprehensive about what she was going to say next.

“Yeah?”

“When you meet Maul tomorrow, don’t… don’t be too scared of him, okay? The thing is, Maul is… well, he works with the bad guys. He might not be what you expect. But if he is still the same man I know him to be, then I promise, he’ll take good care of you.”

“Okay,” she answered simply, and they resumed their meditating.

The next morning, Ahsoka and Chisé left their room early to await Maul’s arrival, only to find out that he’d boarded the _First Light_ hours ago and was already in his meeting with Vos and the rest of Crimson Dawn.

Ahsoka groaned in frustration at this news and asked the guard to lead them to the conference room; the most they could do at this point was wait for him to come out.

So wait they did in the hallway outside. Chisé sat eating breakfast on another expensive couch, while Ahsoka paced the length of the hallway, too nervous to eat, glowering at the gold-lined double doors that led to the conference room. She knew she shouldn’t be so agitated and set a good example for Chisé by demonstrating patience, but she really didn’t care at this point. For the past two days, she’d been trying to find Maul after not seeing him for three years. She had no idea what she’d say, how she’d greet him. And what would be his reaction upon seeing her? Would he be happy, sad or angry? She began to second guess herself, thinking that perhaps this quest to find protection for Chisé was a fool’s errand and that he’d just turn her away. Or worse, that he wouldn’t speak to her at all.

Whatever happened next, Ahsoka just wanted it to happen and be done quickly. If only their meeting would end and those damn doors would open already…

And just like that, the golden doors began to slide open. Ahsoka regained her composer and stood up straight, hands behind her back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So no Maul in this chapter I'm sorryyyyyyyy but I promise the good stuff is coming!
> 
> And I just want to say really quickly that I have not seen Rebels and my knowledge of Star Wars lore is unfortunately not as vast as I'd like it to be. I did do a teensy bit of research for this arc, but I also decided to do my own thing as well ;) So if there are any inaccuracies pertaining to Star Wars canon, please understand that it is not my intention to disregard or disrespect any of the established lore, and that the choices I made are only for the benefit of this story!!
> 
> Thank you for reading!! <3
> 
> [Here's what Pantorans look like btw!](https://www.starwars.com/databank/pantoran)


	3. Chapter 3

The first thing Ahsoka noticed about Maul was his change of clothes. She could only see his profile from inside the conference room, but he now wore all black. He donned a tunic that still exposed his chest down the middle, but it was longer, tied around his waist and extended past his trousers in an effort to hide his legs that were all machine. His strong jaw clenched as Vos spoke, as if he wasn’t pleased with a certain piece of news. Ahsoka thought for a moment that besides his clothing, Maul hadn’t changed one bit.

And then he saw her.

They stood at opposite ends of the room, but she could see the changes in him. His teeth were whiter and his eyes, once a bright yellow that glowed in the dark, were now a soft golden, which widened upon seeing her. But he also looked very tired and worn down.

Ahsoka still hadn’t planned out what she was going to say, so she just stood there. They both were as still as statues, neither moving as they took in each other’s presence.

“Ah yes,” Vos kept talking, also noticing her. “Lord Maul, Lady Tano arrived here yesterday looking for you. She also came with a―”

Maul raised a hand and Vos stopped talking.

“Sir,” he muttered, stepping away. Ahsoka finally realized there were other Crimson Dawn members in the room, all staring perplexed at this new situation. She began to feel self-conscious of everyone watching. Maul, however, didn’t seem to care about the others and only kept his eyes on her. Finally, she heard the familiar clanking, echoing of metal feet against the tiled floor as he made his way towards her.

She was about to say, “Maul, I need to speak with you,” but the words died in her throat as he got closer to her, and he _kept getting closer._ When they were finally face-to-face, he said nothing, but put a gloved hand on her waist and led her swiftly away from the room.

They walked down the hallway quickly and she could feel how tense he was, but despite how agitated his whole manner was, his hold on her waist was achingly gentle. Chisé noticed them leaving and left her breakfast on the sofa, tagging along.

Maul led her to the end of the hallway which had a view out into the stars, and he looked at her intently.

“What are you doing here?” he asked, his deep voice rumbling as he spoke softly. He then noticed her injured elbow. “What happened?” He narrowed his eyes, scrutinizing the bacta patch.

“Just a scratch,” Ahsoka said, and the injury really wasn’t a big deal, but she couldn’t help but feel relieved that he was concerned about her. It was like nothing changed between them after all.

He raised his eyes from her arm to her face, not believing her, but letting it go. “Ahsoka. Tell me you’re not doing business with Crimson Dawn.” His voice was still very quiet.

“No, no. I came looking for you,” she insisted. “You are very hard to find, Maul.”

“Uh…” Maul finally noticed Chisé. “Who is this?” He dropped his hand from Ahsoka’s waist and looked at the little girl.

“I’m Chisé. I like your tattoos.”

Maul blinked at her in surprise, speechless.

“She’s a Force wielder, Maul, like us,” Ahsoka spoke up, catching his attention. “She’s the reason I’m here.” She stepped closer to him. Already, she couldn’t get enough of his presence. The heat seemed to radiate off of him, and she could still feel the ghost of his hand on her hip. “We need to talk.”

“Very well,” he replied with a nod. “Come with me.” He made to walk back down the hallway, but stopped and looked at her. He extended his arm for her to take, waiting. Ahsoka was surprised at this gesture, but went to his side, rested her hand on the crook of his arm and they walked off together, Chisé following closely behind.

They chose a private office that clearly belonged to someone else, but Maul chose to occupy it anyway. Now confident that they were completely alone, he closed the door, letting it slide shut with a hiss and he turned to her.

“Why would you go to _Vos?_ ” he demanded, no longer whispering.

“There was no other option,” Ahsoka said, leaning against a desk. She crossed her arms, watching him closely.

“There’s always another option.”

“Most people don’t even know that you exist; I had to find a way to get to you.”

He was about to retort, but stopped himself. There was a look of regret in his eyes suddenly, as if he was thinking the same thing she was:

_We should have kept in touch._

“Where did she come from?” he then asked, nodding to Chisé, who had found a stylus and was making herself busy scribbling onto a piece of flimsiplast.

“Stormtroopers abducted her and were holding her on Ilun. Maul,” she unfolded her arms. “They were going to take her to the Emperor.”

His eyes sharply found hers, and she saw that look of fear in his eyes, the fear that she knew was caused by only one terrible person.

“What I need you to explain to me,” he said slowly, walking towards her. “Is why you’ve come looking for me _now_ of all times, after three years.” He stopped right in front of her, one metal foot brushing against her boot. “We haven’t spoken…” he trailed off, glancing down at her lips. “Since that day at the space station.”

Ahsoka’s breath caught as she found herself looking at his mouth as well. His teeth were indeed very white now.

Chisé accidentally dropped the stylus onto the floor and it caused a loud clatter. Ahsoka and Maul jumped and he stepped away from her, letting the tense air between them dissipate.

“Listen to me,” she said, folding her arms again, but she kept her voice soft. “I know we parted ways and I am not going to stop you from running your business, as much as I disapprove of it…” She sighed as he glared at her. “You’re one of the few people in this galaxy who is untouchable, even from the Empire.” She glanced at the young girl, who was back to scribbling. “I fear Chisé’s life may be in danger. I’m not like you, Maul. I can’t offer her the protection she needs. I’m on the run enough as it is.”

“You want me to take care of her,” Maul realized.

“Yes,” she said. When he didn’t speak, she added, “If you need credits to pay for any of her expenses, I can provide for her. I can send it to you regularly.”

He waved a hand and walked away from her, pacing the room. “I don’t want your _money._ I have too much of it already, I don’t need yours. What I want is…” He stopped his line of thought and shook his head and looked at her. “This is a lot to take in.”

“I know it’s a big responsibility,” Ahsoka acknowledged, feeling sorry. Asking someone to take care of a child was not as simple as she thought. “Besides credits, I have nothing else to offer you.”

“Would you come to visit her?” he asked.

She looked over at Chisé. She had grown attached to the girl in the few days that she’d known her. It’d make Ahsoka sad to lose another person in her life but…

“No, I’m afraid not,” she answered, shaking her head. “I can’t stay in one place too long. It’s not safe, for me or for her.”

“You say that I can protect her,” Maul said. He paused. “I can protect you, as well.”

Ahsoka hesitated. She’d be lying if she said his offer wasn’t tempting. She thought about the stress she’d gone through the past three years, hopping from place to place, always looking over her shoulder… if she stayed with Maul, she wouldn’t have to do that anymore. She and Chisé would be able to live in comfort for as long as Maul’s business was successful, and it seemed to be more than successful, by the looks of what his employees could afford.

She shook her head. “Thank you, but I couldn’t. There are still so many things I need to do. My destiny is not with Crimson Dawn or the Shadow Collective, it’s out there.”

“Are you not going to teach me to be a Jedi anymore, Master Ahsoka?” Chisé asked, raising her head from her scribbling. She looked hurt, and Ahsoka gazed at her with a pained expression.

“She is your apprentice?” Maul spoke, eyes flashing curiously.

“No, I mean―yes, but not really. I… I haven’t really taught her anything. You don’t need to teach her anything, either,” she added quickly.

His brow furrowed. “Why not?”

“Well, because… the Jedi teach compassion and…” _The Sith only teach hate._ Ahsoka knew that neither she nor Maul were aligned with either side anymore. However, the way Maul was raised, he knew only pain, fear and anger. That was what he was taught, and so that was all he could ever teach Chisé if he took her on as his apprentice. She found that she really couldn’t blame him. It was all he ever knew, and he’d end up causing more harm than good. She didn’t need to finish her sentence; she saw the look on his face that showed he understood what she was thinking.

“She won’t be _my_ apprentice, don’t worry,” he bit out, clearly hurt.

“Maul…” Ahsoka began, but decided to leave it at that. She sighed. “I only need you to look after her.”

He nodded, and then changed the subject. “What _things_ do you need to be doing?”

“As you may know, Ilun is the planet where padawans went to get kyber crystals to make their first lightsaber.”

“Yes, I’ve heard of it.”

“The Empire has occupied it and they’re excavating the entire planet, taking _everything._ So, I…” Ahsoka hadn’t really committed herself to this plan yet, but she was determined now. “I want to find a way to sabotage their operation.”

“Why doesn’t it surprise me that you would go willingly to face an army of stormtroopers alone just so you can save some kyber crystals,” Maul said exasperatedly.

“It’s not just _some_ kyber crystals, Maul. Ilun has always been able to sustain and regenerate itself continually and keep providing them. I don’t know what the Empire wants with them, but they’re destroying the entire planet and soon there won’t be anymore crystals left.” Ahsoka held his gaze, pleading for him to understand. “And besides, I learned my lesson,” she added with a soft smile. “I wouldn’t be going alone, Rex has always got my back.”

She remembered, once more, of when she’d told him to leave her behind on Nimzii, and how he’d ultimately refused.

Maul’s golden eyes searched her blue ones for a moment, thinking.

“Will you and Rex be enough to take back Ilun?” he asked.

“Rex has a few friends,” she explained mysteriously. “It’d be taking a big chance with only a group of us, but I really believe it’s worth it.”

Maul was silent again. Then he said, “I want to help.”

She gawked at him. She thought it was already a stretch to ask him to take care of Chisé, but him actually offering to join her quest? She could hardly believe it.

“And after I help you, I promise to protect the girl,” he continued, then added with a grumble. “For you.” He glanced away at that moment, not meeting her eyes. “Well?” he prompted impatiently, growing uncomfortable with her silence. “Will you let me help or not?”

“Of course,” she answered, a smile growing on her face. “Of course I will.”

They immediately returned to the _First Light_ ’s ship hangar, Maul volunteering to take his ship to Seelos. Vos and his guards were there to see them off.

“It was a pleasure to meet you, Lady―er, Miss Tano,” he corrected himself. “We hope to see you aboard the _First Light_ again soon.”

She nodded to him and then he addressed Maul.

“We’ll be receiving the new shipments very soon, Lord Maul. The transaction should go smoothly, if not―”

“Just take care of it,” Maul said wearily, then put a hand on Ahsoka’s back, prompting her to board his ship.

The transport was _huge,_ yet it still fit inside the hangar. They’d agreed to tow Ahsoka’s ship on their way to Seelos, but she definitely wouldn’t mind travelling with Maul. The ramp opened up to a large lobby; the built-in furniture and rooms were expensive, but clearly unused.

“Over here,” Maul called to her, leading her and Chisé to the front of the ship. The cockpit was spacious and contained the pilot and co-pilot seats along with three passenger seats in the back―again, unused.

Chisé strapped herself in and cast her eyes about the cockpit, in awe of all the fancy interior, gadgets and buttons that lined the area. Ahsoka first thought of sitting next to her in one of the passenger seats, but she chose to sit in the co-pilot seat as Maul flipped several switches to bring the ship to life. Hopefully he wouldn’t mind if she kept him company.

“It shouldn’t take us long to reach Seelos,” she told him.

“Why is the Commander staying on that piece of rubbish of a planet? Hardly anyone lives out there.”

“You’ll see.” Ahsoka sat back in her seat, staring out the front window. The last time she was on a ship with Maul, they were trying to escape Nimzii and get help for Rex. She never thought she’d be travelling with Maul again, and though the reason for it was not one to be letting one’s guard down for, it felt nice. Turning her head to stare at him as he steered his ship out of the hangar and into space, she noticed once more how tired he looked. The black tattoos that covered his face hid the bags under his eyes very well, but up close they were unmistakably there.

“You look exhausted,” she said. He glanced at her before turning his attention to turning on the hyperdrive.

“Running a business has its many downsides,” he replied reluctantly. “Lack of sleep is one of them.”

“What else?”

He let out a long, drawn out breath. The ship jumped to lightspeed and he mimicked her posture, leaning back into his seat and crossing his arms. “The constant travel. I’m always on the move, so I spend more time on this ship than anywhere else.”

Ahsoka spun her body in her seat to look back at the lobby, understanding. “Wait… you _live_ on this ship?”

“Indeed, this is my permanent residence; I never stay in one place for too long.”

“Me neither.”

He looked at her then, turning his attention to the injury on her elbow again.

“How did you get that?”

“A stormtrooper grazed me with his blaster on Ilun,” she said with a shrug. “It’s probably about healed by now.”

“If you were on Ilun,” he said slowly, his eyes sharply finding hers. “You were getting kyber crystals to make your own lightsaber. What happened to the one from… before?”

“I still have it. I hardly use it, though.” She threw him a grin. “I couldn’t run into the same problem that we did on Nimzii, could I?”

He nodded, and then they were both thinking the same thing:

“The other lightsaber that I gave you…” she went on, trailing off. “I’m sure you’ve had no need for it.”

“I don’t use a lightsaber anymore,” he told her, and her heart sank with disappointment. Had he thrown it away? He then promptly rose from his seat and disappeared for a minute. Curious, Ahsoka watched him enter a room and return, holding a small ornate box. He turned his seat 90 degrees so that he faced her, his knees brushing against hers. He showed her the box and opened it. Sure enough, it was there. The old weapon sat untouched in a plush insulation, protecting its exterior. “You thought I’d tossed it,” he said, reading the look on her face.

Her eyes raised from the box to his face. “You kept it,” she said, not sure what else to say.

“I have―for three years. I don’t know what I was waiting for, but…” he closed the box carefully and held it in his lap. “I kept it safe and treasured it.” He tore away from her gaze. “It seemed like the appropriate thing to do.”

They finished the rest of the trip in silence, and Ahsoka was in high spirits. Even after three years, he continued to surprise her.

* * *

Ahsoka had never been to Seelos before; Rex discouraged her from visiting to avoid risk of detection, but she realized there may have been another reason: the planet truly was rubbish, as Maul described. She thought he was exaggerating, but she couldn’t imagine why anyone would want to live here, if only to escape.

“We’re seeing Rex again?” Chisé asked eagerly again, taking Ahsoka’s hand and swinging it as the three exited the ship and walked across the dry cracked land.

“Yes,” Ahsoka said to her kindly. “I’m sure he’ll be happy to see us.” Up ahead was a large wooden shack, two stories high and perched on stilts so that it didn’t sink into the ground. “At least, I hope he will be,” she muttered. Maul, walking beside her, caught what she said.

“He doesn’t know we’re coming?” he demanded.

“No.”

“So, are you saying that Rex is not aware of your plan?”

“Um… yes.”

“Ahsoka―”

“Listen,” she cut him off. “I may be making this up as I go, but let me remind you that I was a commander for the Republic since I was a teenager.” They arrived at the house and began making their way up the creaking stairs. “I know how to plan a military assault. We’ll be ready for Ilun.”

“And what if he says no?” Maul asked.

“Well, then it’s a good thing I have you, isn’t it?” she said, turning to him as they stood in front of the door.

He let out a scoff and shook his head as if he was annoyed, but Ahsoka knew better than that. She could see right through him, putting up a front. She found herself smiling at him and when he caught her in the act, she quickly cleared her throat and knocked on the door.

“State your business,” a harsh voice answered, a voice not unlike Rex’s, but obviously different.

“I’m a friend of Rex’s,” Ahsoka said. “It’s Ahsoka Tano.”

“Ah!” the voice sounded excited. They then heard about thirty seconds’ worth of bolts and other security measures being unlocked. Ahsoka and Maul glanced at each other while Chisé swung her hand impatiently. The door finally opened and revealed a man with Rex’s features, except he had a beard and there was a long scar over his right eye. He beamed upon seeing Ahsoka. “It’s a delight to finally meet you! Come in, come in!” He stepped aside to let the newcomers in.

“Wow,” Chisé voiced. The shack was handmade and there were some places where it was a little worse for wear, but it felt like a home.

“Attention, troopers!” the man who welcomed them shouted. “Meeting in the front room!” There was a thunder of footsteps coming from the second floor as four other men made their way down to see what the commotion was all about. Rex, who came down last, shook his head when he saw Ahsoka, though he was smiling.

“Guess we saw each other too soon, after all, kid,” he said. “I’m guessing this means something bad has happened?”

She smiled sheepishly. “That’s right.”

Rex then noticed Maul and his jaw dropped. “You found him? She found you?” He went up to him, shocked. “I can’t believe it.”

“You look like you’ve aged a decade, Commander,” Maul said reaching out his hand. Rex barked out a laugh and they shook hands.

“Good to see you, too, Maul. Hey there, little padawan,” he then said to Chisé with a wink. “Now, let me introduce you to the boys, you’ve met Wolffe―”

Maul leaned over to Ahsoka and whispered, “Just how hard were you trying to look for me, Ahsoka?” She looked at him and he had a small, knowing smile on his face. She rolled her eyes at him, trying to bite back a smile.

“This is Gregor, Frost and Orion,” Rex finished, and they all saluted.

“Honored to meet you, Commander Tano,” Orion said. Ahsoka couldn't help but smile. She hadn’t been a commander for a long time, but she was touched that they called her by her old title.

“At ease,” she said automatically, her hands behind her back and they relaxed, copying her stance. “I'm the one who's honored to meet you all. I’m pleased to see you alive and well.”

“Define ‘alive’, sir,” Wolffe joked. “We’ve been in this desert for over a year. Don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful Rex here found us, but…”

“Come on, we’ve all been on worse planets,” Gregor cut in, nudging him.

“I’m sure it hasn’t been easy,” Ahsoka acknowledged sadly. “If you boys are feeling up to it, I have a favor to ask of you.”

“Anything, sir!” Frost spoke up. “I’ve been itching for some action!” All five men voiced their enthusiasm, and Ahsoka's heart soared.

“But first, we eat!” Wolffe announced. “The little one here looks hungry, ain’t ya?” Chisé nodded shyly in response.

Dinner was pleasant. Wolffe, Gregor, Frost and Orion recalled their crazy adventures as to how Rex found them and how they were able to remove their chips. Ahsoka and Maul, seated side by side, listened with interest as Chisé dug eagerly into her food.

“A difficult process to be sure,” Gregor said. “Rex suggested we lay low for a while before trying to go out again in the future.”

“Brothers help brothers,” Orion agreed gruffly.

“Rex has told me about how you saved them on a Jedi Cruiser,” Wolffe brought up, looking at Maul.

“It was nothing,” Maul said quietly, seemingly uncomfortable with all the attention on him suddenly.

“It wasn’t nothing,” Ahsoka said gently. “I never would have expected it from him, but…” she looked at him, smiling softly. “I’m glad he came back.”

He looked at her in surprise, and he was almost shy as he picked at his food. Ahsoka never thought she would think this of him, but… he was _endearing._ She wanted to put her hand on his arm in comfort, but lost her courage at the last moment and turned back to her food as well. Neither of them saw the clones exchange raised eyebrows at each other.

Rex cleared his throat. “I suggest we leave tomorrow early in the morning to scout the planet. Ahsoka, Maul and I can go take a look and from there we can make a plan.”

Wolffe lifted his cup. “Sounds good to me!” he boomed and Chisé giggled.

“Master Ahsoka,” she said, turning to her with a loud yawn. “I’m tired.”

“Ah, the little ankle biter needs her sleep,” Rex said fondly. “Apologies for the lack of space, kid, we only have one room left. I don’t suppose…” he added, looking at Maul. “That the three of you mind sharing?”

“Shared room is fine,” Ahsoka answered just as Maul said, “I think not.” They looked at each other. Chisé giggled again.

* * *

Ahsoka was once again tinkering around with the pieces of her new lightsaber to no avail, sitting on the bed in the guest room, when Rex walked in with Chisé.

“You’re in luck,” he said as he and Chisé carried several blankets and three pillows in their arms. “This is the nicest room we have, and with the biggest bed.”

“Thank you,” Ahsoka said sincerely, taking the blankets and pillows from them. “I can’t thank you enough for taking us in for the night, and for agreeing to help.”

“I should be thanking you,” he replied with a grin. “The guys are really happy that you three are here; it’s nice to have some new faces around here, you know?” Ahsoka nodded, smiling back. “Good night, kid. Good night, Chisé!”

“Good night!” the girl responded. Ahsoka went and laid out the blankets on the wide mattress, then fluffed up the pillows for Chisé before she jumped onto the bed and curled up under the covers.

“The guys are going to watch you while we go to Ilun tomorrow,” Ahsoka told her, tucking her in. “Are you okay with that?”

“Sure,” she answered, burying her head into one of the three pillows. “It’s like I have five uncles,” she added, looking up at Ahsoka happily, which made her laugh.

“It sure is. Good night.” She stroked Chisé’s hair as she went to sleep, and then looked over her shoulder. She didn’t know when Maul had come into the room, but he stood by the door, watching the two with an unreadable expression on his face. Realizing he was caught, he cleared his throat and headed over to the window to watch the rising half moon.

“Are you going to stand there all night?” she asked him teasingly.

“N-no, I’m going to…” he looked around the room and spotted an armchair by a small table. “I’m going to sleep here.” He took a seat and leaned back, crossing his arms.

“Seriously? That looks so uncomfortable,” she commented as she got under the covers with Chisé. The bed was normally made for two adults and Chisé didn’t take up much room at all; they could definitely make some space for him.

“I will be fine,” he snapped. She snorted but didn’t push him any further. She wouldn’t stop him from getting a sore neck in the morning.

“Suit yourself,” she sighed, lying comfortably on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. And after a beat of silence, “See you tomorrow, Maul.”

She thought maybe he was ignoring her at one point, so she turned on her side and closed her eyes.

But then she heard a soft, “Good night, Ahsoka.”

She smiled into her pillow and soon fell asleep, dreaming of the beautiful island once more.

* * *

A strange sense of nostalgia overcame Ahsoka as she, Maul and Rex left Seelos and headed for Ilun. She sat down in the co-pilot seat once more next to Maul as they took off. The trip was short and mostly quiet, but Rex was in high spirits, ready to get into some action again.

“They don’t use clankers so much anymore, I noticed,” he commented as he cleaned his blaster in the lobby of Maul’s ship. “Guess they finally realized how useless they are.”

“That is true,” Maul agreed. “I have seen a decrease in their numbers. I’m assuming they’ve been decommissioned and used for spare parts, whatever it is the Empire needs them for these days.” He said the word “Empire” rather harshly, then noticed Ahsoka looking at him with concern. He sighed, trying to reassure her, “I’m fine.”

“Let’s keep in the clouds for now,” Ahsoka told them once they were in Ilun’s atmosphere. “I don’t want them to see us. Then land when you’re in the clear.” Shivering, she stood to go get her cloak. Before she left the cockpit, she put a comforting hand on his shoulder. He glanced at it, then up at her before concentrating on flying.

“You ever have that thought,” Rex grumbled as they marched through the blizzard. “It’s so hot here, I wouldn’t mind having a snowstorm? That was me when we left Seelos, and now I regret it.” Then he added to Maul, “How are you still functioning?”

“A Zabrak has two hearts,” Maul answered, slightly amused at how much Rex and Ahsoka were suffering. “It helps us to endure physical activities for longer periods of time, as well as survive in colder environments―with exceptions to extreme temperatures, of course.”

“Must be nice,” Ahsoka snapped. She hadn’t meant to sound so irritable, but she hated the cold weather. Maul didn’t seem offended, though, and just laughed quietly to himself.

“How much farther?” Rex called to her.

“It’s just up here,” she shouted back. They climbed up the steep hill, pushing through the snow until finally, they made it to the top. To her dismay, the wind was much stronger with no barrier of any mountains, and the cold went right through her bones. Her teeth chattered and she could feel her nose start to run.

Suddenly, she felt a source of warmth from behind her and knew instantly that it was Maul. He was like a beacon of fire in this land of ice. He put a hand between her shoulder blades and regarded the campsite about a mile away. “When you said there were a few stormtroopers, I thought you really had meant a few.”

Ahsoka looked and saw that since the last time she’d come to Ilun, the number of soldiers had at least tripled. She motioned for the three of them to duck and they crouched reluctantly into the snow. Maul’s warm hand remained on her back, and for that she was grateful.

“There were only a few last time,” she insisted, then got out a pair of macrobinoculars. “I see…” she did a quick count, “at least fifty men down there. They’ve been divided in half, one squadron guarding the wall outside, the other inside by the entrance―wait…” She paused, zooming in. There were machines walking in and out of the cave, about twice the size of a trooper and most likely being piloted by one. It had two legs and looked like a crude prototype, but it was unlike anything she’d seen before. “Take a look,” she said, handing the binoculars to Rex.

“Eh, they’re just bigger clankers,” he said casually.

“You may need to modify your plan,” Maul told Ahsoka. She nodded, narrowing her eyes at this new development, thinking. Her plan would need a _big_ modification indeed.

As they made their way back to the ship, Ahsoka’s spirits were at an all-time low. With only seven of them, it’d be impossible for them to take back Ilun. All those kyber crystals, taken without any consideration with what it was doing to the planet, it was hopeless. Rex went inside the ship first, but Maul noticed her forlorn expression.

“You look troubled,” he said, staying behind to walk with her.

“During my time as a commander,” she began. “I’ve led many battles, too many to count. Fighting a war was all I ever knew, and I was good at it,” she looked at him, a pain in her heart. “I had thousands of men at my command, but it’s completely different now. There’s only seven of us; we’re _severely_ outnumbered. I already knew before we came here that we’d have to take the lives of those stormtroopers down there, I just…” She stopped in her tracks and sighed. “Rex and the others are going to be risking their lives for something I hadn’t even accounted for. Not only are there more men, but there are those _machines_ down there, Maul. Maybe I’ve lost my touch, I don’t want my friends to die over a mistake that I’ve made.”

He stepped in front of her, also blocking out the wind, and she completely forgot all about the cold. “Rex and his brothers will follow you wherever you go,” he told her, putting a hand on her shoulder. “As will I.”

Ahsoka felt a smile grow on her face, but she shook her head. “You’ve never served under me. How can you be so loyal already?”

“Well,” he said, and he gently guided her towards the ship. “From what I’ve heard, you have a very good reputation as commander.”

She appreciated his words more than she could say, and she leaned against him, feeling safe, as they walked back together.

* * *

“Ahsoka!” Chisé squealed as soon as they came into view of the shack. She’d been playing outside and sprinted towards her, grabbing her around the waist in a tight hug.

“I wasn’t gone very long,” Ahsoka said, but hugged her back all the same. The men waved in greeting to her, Rex and Maul as they made their way back to the house.

“You were gone _all day._ I missed you,” Chisé said, looking up at her with a worried expression. “I was afraid you wouldn’t come back.”

Ahsoka’s chest tightened as she looked at the girl’s adoring yet concerned eyes. She really did look up to Ahsoka, didn’t she? She caressed Chisé’s cheek gently.

“Well, I’m here now, aren’t I?” she said, taking her hand and walking up the steps.

“Yes, but then you’re going to leave again,” Chisé said quietly. Once they entered the house, she tugged Ahsoka over to the dining table to sit down.

“One more time, to take care of things on Ilun, yes.”

“And then you’re going to be gone forever.”

Ahsoka stared at her. _That’s right,_ she remembered. _After this is all over, you’re staying with Maul and I’m on the run again._ She almost couldn’t bear to see how heartbroken Chisé looked in that moment. This young girl, so bright and happy and sweet, and just like that, Ahsoka would never see her again.

“How about,” she said slowly, and Chisé sat up straight. “I give you one more lesson? From a master to her apprentice?”

“Really?” Chisé jumped in her seat, eager. “Yes please, Master Ahsoka!”

They headed back outside and Ahsoka got a hold of two long sticks.

“Are we pretending these are lightsabers?” Chisé asked quizzically.

“Yes,” Ahsoka said, handing one of them to her. “There are seven forms of combat when it comes to lightsabers. We’ll start with the first one: Shii-Cho.” Chisé nodded seriously, gripping the stick tightly.

“The most basic, elementary form,” a voice added and Ahsoka turned. Maul had come outside to watch. “Also known as the most boring one,” he drawled.

Ahsoka scrunched her nose at him. “It’s what all younglings start with,” she argued. “It’s for teaching them defense.”

He walked towards her and held out his hand. “May I?” And when she looked hesitant, he added softly so that only she could hear, “Don’t worry, just trust me.”

Ahsoka nodded and handed him the stick, then sat on the bottom of steps, hugging her arms, and couldn’t help but worry at what Maul would show her.

“Your master is right,” Maul admitted, shrugging a shoulder as he went to stand in front of Chisé. “Before you even build your own lightsaber, as a padawan, you must learn the foundations of a good defense, which means a firm, strong stance.” He bent his knees and spread his legs so that he was planted firmly to the ground. He then held the stick with both hands, bringing it by his face. Chisé immediately copied him, or at least tried to. Maul stood and walked over to her, lightly tapping her foot. “Do you see how easily your foot moved?”

“Yes,” she said, looking down at her feet, brow furrowed in concentration.

“That is what we do not want. And relax your knees, if they’re locked you will hurt yourself.”

Chisé took a deep breath and jumped up and down to loosen her legs up, then tried again.

“Very good,” Maul praised, and he looked at Ahsoka for approval. She smiled and nodded, encouraging him to keep going.

“Now, say that another person with a lightsaber is coming at you. If you do not anticipate their attacks, you will be quickly defeated and most likely killed. Ready?”

Chisé hesitated, the stick hovering by her side.

“Er…” Maul tried again. He glanced at Ahsoka once more. “I mean, just watch how I’m moving and block me with your weapon. It’s alright,” he added gently. “Give it all you’ve got.”

Chisé nodded and smiled, determined. Maul slowly moved the stick in the air from the side, moving towards her shoulder. She brought her stick over and blocked his attack, making a sharp _clack_ with the wood.

“Very good,” Maul praised. “Again.” This time he went towards the ground, again at a slow speed, towards her legs. She blocked that, too. They practiced a few more times, each at a different area. Maul gradually picked up the pace, and she caught on quickly. “Well done,” he told her and she beamed, then caught Ahsoka’s eye.

“How’d I do?” she asked.

“That was really great,” Ahsoka complimented her sincerely.

“Thank you, Master Maul,” Chisé said, looking up at him with a grin. He was surprised at being called, “Master,” by this young girl, then he smiled back.

“Now, can I _please_ watch you two fight?”

“What?” Ahsoka said before she could stop herself.

“Hm,” Maul looked over at her. “Now _that_ is an idea.”

“I dunno if we should, it’s getting late. I really―”

“I believe Master Ahsoka is making excuses, don’t you think?” Maul said and Chisé giggled.

“Yes, I think so,” she agreed.

“Alright, alright, if you two _insist._ ” Ahsoka got up from her seat and accepted the stick from Chisé.

“Think of it as a teaching opportunity for your padawan,” Maul said, circling her, spinning the stick in his hand.

“I beat you once,” she said coolly as they orbited each other. “I can do it again.” She smirked at him and took her stance. He grinned.

And then he lunged for her. He went directly for her head, swinging down. She smacked the stick aside and leaped sideways, aiming for his ribs, which he blocked quickly. Unbeknownst to them, Rex and his brothers had come outside with Chisé, taking their seats on the front steps of the house to watch.

“What will you do,” Maul continued, taunting her after she blocked another one of his attacks, stepping backwards. “Since you only have one stick and not two of them?”

“Need I remind you that I defeated you not only after I dropped both of my lightsabers,” Ahsoka shot back. “But also by using yours?” She caught his next blow, pushing up and spinning them around. He barked out a laugh.

“You have mastered all seven forms, yes, Ahsoka? Then you will be familiar with the fourth form.”

 _Ataru,_ Ahsoka remembered. _Favored by the Sith._ He proceeded to attack more aggressively, swinging the stick in precise, measured strokes and using his strength, but Ahsoka fought right back, ducking under and sweeping at his legs so that he fell. He went to the ground, flat on his back before leaping up again.

“Or how about the most aggressive of them all?” Maul added, proceeding to use the seventh form, Juyo, to get the upper hand. He caught the stick in her hand and spun his arm around, nearly ripping the stick from her grasp. To escape, Ahsoka pulled down hard and rolled on the ground, getting behind him. He lunged once more, stabbing at her, until she used his extended arm to her advantage, catching his wrist and finally knocking the stick out his hand with a loud _clack!_ as both pieces of wood collided. She made an arc with her stick towards his legs and tripped him again so that he lay flat on his back. She pointed the stick at his neck, smiling triumphantly. She could hear Chisé saying something while the brothers cheered wildly, but she wasn’t really paying attention to anyone except for the man before her.

“And that is why Shii-Cho remains, above all odds, the one form you can rely on in the end.” Ahsoka switched the stick to her other hand, then reached down to help him up.

He let out a sigh, then took her hand, only to pull her down next to him. “Oof!” she grunted as she landed in the dust on her stomach. She propped herself up on her elbows, glaring at him.

“And that is why compassion is a weakness,” he returned, his golden eyes flashing not with rage or fury, but with something else behind them that she couldn’t quite place.

“Is it?” she challenged, her heart racing at their proximity. They stayed like that on the ground for a moment, looking at each other. The look in his eyes only increased as he leaned towards her. Ahsoka watched as Maul raised a gloved hand, reaching out to touch her face.

Then Chisé cleared her throat very loudly. They snapped back to reality and looked to where she was standing a couple of feet away, hands on her hips.

“I _said,_ ” she said dramatically. “Is it okay if Uncle Rex and Uncle Wolffe teach me how to fight using my hands?” She was slightly annoyed, clearly asking this question for the second time. She raised her fists to demonstrate what she was talking about.

The two adults quickly stood, dusting themselves off. Maul reached down to pick up the sticks while Ahsoka stood up straight, hands behind her back.

“Yes,” she said with an air of calmness that she wasn’t feeling.

“Okay!” Chisé said happily and ran off.

Ahsoka and Maul glanced at each other, then looked away awkwardly. He cleared his throat, then stepped aside so that she could go into the house first. She nodded curtly, then marched up the steps.

* * *

Chisé was fast asleep, exhausted from an afternoon’s lessons of lightsaber duels and hand-to-hand combat. Maul sat once more in the armchair by the window, watching as Ahsoka used the Force to attempt making her lightsaber. He tilted his head in surprise when she groaned in frustration, and she glanced at him. She cleared her throat.

“Ahem, I don’t normally have this problem,” she said, her pride a little hurt now that he was seeing her fail.

“I didn’t say anything.”

 _One more try, and then I’m going to bed,_ she thought. She waved a hand and the pieces and two kyber crystals floated in the air, but it was the same result. They dropped with a soft thud onto the blankets. She scooped them up, went to the table where he sat and dropped the pieces into a small bag.

“How long have you been doing that?” he asked, nodding to the bag.

“A few days,” she answered with a sigh. “I can’t imagine what the problem must be, it just doesn't make sense.”

“Hm. I’m sorry to say that I cannot offer any advice. Every lightsaber I’ve owned was never made by myself.”

She nodded, understanding what he meant; the Sith would take a Jedi’s lightsaber, then bleed the kyber crystal, thus making the color of their new saber red. She realized that he could’ve done so with the one that she’d given him, but he had not.

She gave the bag one last glare before heading back to the bed. She thought about what Chisé had suggested when she was teaching her to meditate:

_“Maybe you’re distracted? Something is bugging you?”_

If there was something distracting her, the answer was easy to find, and that answer was sitting on an uncomfortable armchair, watching her as she got ready for bed. Was it because of Maul that she couldn’t forge her new lightsabers? No, that couldn’t be it, it had to be something else. It had to do something with _her,_ there was something Ahsoka was doing wrong, and that was preventing her from making her new weapons.

She gently scooted Chisé away from the edge of the bed so that she wouldn’t fall off, and was about to lift the blankets to get in herself, when she looked over at Maul again. His eyes were closed and his arms crossed, but he obviously wasn’t sleeping.

“Come over here,” she called to him. His eyes opened and he looked at her, shocked.

“No, it’s alright…” he said hesitantly. “I’m fine here.”

“No you’re not.” She rolled her eyes. “You’re going to hurt yourself if you keep sleeping on that chair, now stop arguing with me and get over here. There’s plenty of room,” she added, patting the empty spot. She watched him have some kind of internal battle that almost made her laugh, until finally he slowly stood and walked over. Trying not to wake Chisé, he carefully lay down on the other side of the bed, looking up at the ceiling, which was made up of varying sizes of wooden boards. It was clearly haphazardly put together, and therefore had gaps in between that let the stars peek through.

“Comfortable?” Ahsoka asked jokingly. He looked anything but. He was too tense. He glanced at her, then over at Chisé.

“She’s a good student,” he commented, before looking up at the ceiling again. “Very smart, and a quick learner.”

“She is,” Ahsoka agreed. She reached over and pulled the blankets over the girl’s shoulders. “I think she likes you,” she added.

“Me?” he asked in genuine surprise.

“Yes,” she said. She adjusted her head on the pillow so she could see him better. “You should have seen the way she was looking at you today while you were teaching her. I think you could be a good teacher after all.”

He didn’t seem to agree and grimaced slightly. “No, I couldn’t. What she doesn’t need is a master whose only lessons have been pain and suffering. There’s too much darkness. I don’t…” he looked over at Chisé again, a protective look in his eyes. “I don’t want that for her.” He caught Ahsoka’s eye.

“But she doesn’t need the light, either,” Ahsoka said. “I haven’t been wanting to teach her much because…” she sighed and turned onto her back. “The Jedi teachings are all I know. But there are some principles I can’t agree with, such as the rule that attachments are forbidden. Attachment, forming relationships, that’s not a bad thing, in my experience. How can I teach her something when I don’t even live it?” She shook her head, not wanting to think about it. She turned back onto her side to watch Chisé’s chest rise and fall at an even pace; she hoped she was dreaming of something happy. “I’ll need a place for her to hide tomorrow while we go to Ilun,” she realized.

“Don’t worry,” Maul said softly. “I’ll take care of it.” She nodded even though he wasn’t looking, grateful that he was keeping his promise to look after Chisé. After a few moments of silence when Ahsoka thought he’d fallen asleep, he said, “You are a good master for her, by the way. You underestimate yourself.” He turned his head towards her. “Even though you don’t have your own lightsaber,” he added jokingly.

She would have punched him if the action didn’t risk waking Chisé. “Look who’s talking. Speaking of which, why don’t you use a lightsaber anymore?”

“Ah, so we are asking personal questions now, are we? Well, I shall answer if you will answer a question of mine.”

“I accept.”

He smiled at her softly, then cast his eyes to the twinkling stars. “The only way that I’ve been taught to make a lightsaber, is to steal the one that belonged to a Jedi. To a Sith, that is the most valuable. In order to bleed the crystal, you must inflict upon it all of your pain, anger and hate. I’ve done that for as long as I can remember.” He frowned deeply. “I haven’t made my own lightsaber in recent years because…” He paused, thinking about what he was going to say. “I doubt that even if I tried to bleed a crystal now, I would fail. I… don’t have so much pain and hate within me anymore―as of three years ago, it happens.”

Ahsoka’s heartbeat quickened at that last statement. She swallowed. “Alright then, what’s your question for me?”

Finally, Maul readjusted himself so that he was lying on his side and facing her, his golden eyes searching hers.

“Why is it so important to you that you take back Ilun from the Empire? And before you say it’s because of the kyber crystals,” he added quickly before she could say anything. “I know that’s not the only reason. So tell me.”

With him facing her completely now, Ahsoka found it hard to tell him, as if he would think her explanation foolish and naive. But to hell with it, she wanted him to know.

“For the past three years, I’ve been trying to figure out who I am,” she began, and that statement sounded a little lame to her own ears, but she went on. “I’m not a Jedi, and I thought I would be fine with just being me, but I don't know what that even means.” She released a long sigh. “At every planet that I’ve been hiding on―and there have been a lot―I’ve been trying to help the people who live there in any way I can.” It was true, Ahsoka would assist the civilians in various ways, protecting them from gangsters or predators, helping them with physical labor, anything she could do to make a difference. “But, they were all small things, not enough.”

“They weren’t small to those people, it was enough for them, I’m sure,” Maul pointed out. She appreciated that he said that, but she shook her head.

“But not for me. I want to help Chisé, and she’s not the first person I’ve tried to help, but eventually I have to let them go. I can’t let them get close to me,” she said, even though it was completely different with Chisé. She’d already gotten close to the young girl, more than she’d planned. “So, that’s why I want to do this. Those things I did were small, but this operation on Ilun is big. It’s something directly caused by the Empire, so I thought that if I―if I got rid of them, fought back, then I don’t know… I thought maybe afterwards, my path would be shown to me. I would receive an answer, as to what my purpose really is.”

Maul seemed to understand. “That is good,” he said after a moment of contemplating. “That you are looking for your purpose. You are reaching out for it, whereas I… I have none.”

“What do you mean?”

“I’m exhausted, Ahsoka,” he said, closing his eyes and wrinkling his brow. “I’ve been exhausted for as long as I can remember, and this business of mine, my Shadow Collective, makes me weary to the point where I can barely function. At first, power and money was all I ever wanted, it’s all I’ve ever known.” His eyes opened, blazing in anger. “But it’s not enough anymore. No matter how much power, no matter how many riches I possess, it is all for naught. _He_ will always be there. Even if he lets me live right now, as long as he is around, I will never be free. I will never escape his shadow.” He shivered slightly. “He’s too powerful to destroy, in the end…”

Ahsoka wished with all her heart that she knew what the right words were to say to him. She wanted to comfort him, but she didn’t know how. He was right, they’d talked about this years before on Nimzii: the Emperor was as powerful as ever, and it seemed there was nothing anyone could do to stop him. Not for the first time, Ahsoka found that she and Maul had been on the same page about a lot of things, even more they’d met.

“Thank you,” she said, saying the first thing that came to mind. “For helping me.” He blinked at her slowly, and she knew that he understood her intentions.

“Today was vastly different from what I normally do,” he offered. “It was… a breath of fresh air.”

“I’m glad.”

He sighed through his nose, then looked away. “Good night, Ahsoka,” he said.

“Good night, Maul.”

And she closed her eyes, trying to sleep, but to no avail. Being able to talk about all of these things with Maul, all of her worries, it took a heavy burden off her shoulders, and she hoped she was able to do the same for him. However, she couldn’t seem to fall asleep. She tried not to move around so much so as not to wake up either Chisé and Maul, but she couldn’t relax. Was there something else on her mind, something else that was keeping her mind awake despite the long day she’d had?

She opened her eyes and saw Maul’s sleeping face before her on his pillow.

_Oh._

So it was him. He was on her mind, of course he was. He’d been on her mind ever since she met him. There was so much she’d gone through since then, constantly looking over her shoulder and living on pure adrenaline alone to survive, that she’d never let herself stop and think about the one thing that was always at the back of her head.

It _was_ him.

No matter how much she’d worried that he could have changed after three years, no matter much she’d fretted over never finding out her purpose in life, he was there. He was constant, and he was here right in front of her. Perhaps these past few days had all been a dream, a fantasy of hers, and she was actually asleep in a worn down motel, getting in a few hours of rest before taking off early in the morning.

Ahsoka reached out with her hand, to see if he was actually there, to confirm that this was her reality. She wanted to feel his skin, trace his tattoos, trace every curve and edge of him. Her fingers almost touched him before she felt the breath from his nose on her hand. It was warm, it was _real._ She smiled, comforted and satisfied. Maybe now she could finally sleep.

But before she could draw her hand back, his eyes opened and he saw her. She nearly jumped at how quick his reaction was. His gaze flickered down to her hand near his face, then back to her. She was afraid of what he’d do next, good or bad.

Her hand still wouldn’t move, hovering in front of him as she watched him, frozen. Then, he gently took her hand in his and brought it closer to his face, until she was finally touching him. His hand, thankfully with no glove on, was warm, and his cheek was a fire to her fingertips. He watched as she sucked in a breath, running her thumb over the sharp marks on his cheek.

“Maul,” she whispered, her voice quiet, and not only because there was a sleeping child in between them. He scooted closer to her, waiting for her to speak. “I wish…” she swallowed. “I wish I didn’t miss those years we were apart. I wish I didn’t miss you as much as I did.”

“Ahsoka…”

He scooted even closer to her, reaching out to touch her.

“I’ve thought about you every single day since then,” he said. His thumb traced the white marking on her cheek. “Even when I tried not to, something would just remind me of you and I couldn’t help it.” Wanting more, he cupped her jaw so that he could see all of her face.

And then he glanced down at her lips.

She involuntarily licked them and he watched the movement, a wanting look in his eyes. Her eyes fluttered shut as she could hear him, _feel_ him getting closer to her.

And then Chisé, sensing in her sleep that she was getting less and less room, suddenly kicked her legs and threw out her arms, snoring. Ahsoka caught Maul’s eye and they laughed silently, both drawing back to their sides of the bed and she readjusted the blanket to cover Chisé’s sleeping form.

The air was light, and Ahsoka felt happy, happier during these past few days than she’d felt in a long time. She wondered what would have happened if they hadn’t been interrupted, but somehow she wasn’t disappointed. More than anything, the anticipation for what could have happened was more exciting than the thing actually happening, she figured. She could be wrong, but there was always a chance in the future to find out, she hoped.

She reached under the pillows to find Maul’s hand, and grasped onto his fingers when she found them. She smiled at him as he held onto her.

“Good night,” she whispered.

“Good night,” he returned.

And they finally slept.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Soooo I upped the chapter count again, but hear me out!! We're finally getting into the thick of it, and before we get to the finale, I wanted to have our characters to just have a niiiiice looong chat. Chapter four really is the the last chapter though lol! Also, there's quite a bit of sleeping in this fic isn't there? haha
> 
> And thank you always for all of the lovely comments! They really helped me to get this chapter out, and I'm just so happy that you guys are having as much fun with this story as I am!! The middle portion of an arc can always be tough to get through, but we made it!! And now we're coming close to the end!
> 
> I hope you were able to enjoy this chapter, and thank you for reading!! <3


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We've finally reached the end, lads! And it's our longest chapter yet! I hope you enjoy <3
> 
>  **WARNING:** This chapter contains a little bit of body horror. I kept it brief and as vague as possible, just because that's not what this story is about and it's not what we're here for, but I thought it was important to mention!

In her dream, Ahsoka revisited the peaceful island, and this time she was not a passive viewer, but actually walking about. She could feel the small pebbles and sand scrape underneath her boots as she stood on the beach, looking up at the rocky cliffs of the island. There was a path of old steps that lined the cliffs, practically begging to be explored.

 _Only way to go is up,_ Ahsoka thought, and she proceeded to make the trek. As seen before in her previous visions, she once again saw the old stone huts, but they were empty once more.

She moved on, walking up farther and farther up the steps.

“Hello?” she heard herself say, looking for any sign of life. She had a feeling she would find what she was looking for once she made it to the top. When she did, she gasped. The view at the peak of this island displayed an incredible sight. The ocean was a dark, amber color as two suns hung low in the orange sky, about to set.

“It is beautiful, isn’t it?” a voice asked. A feeling of joy spread in Ahsoka’s chest, recognizing the voice this time. She turned around, but before she could really take in the presence of the other person, really see who it was and recognize their red and black marked face―

She woke up.

Ahsoka slowly opened her eyes, immediately aware of the sunlight shining through the gaps in the ceiling. She was about to lift one of her arms to block out the light from her eyes, but it was stuck; she felt a sharp pain run down from her shoulder all the way to her wrist. She blinked, slowly becoming more and more awake. One arm, which rested at her side, was fine, but the other felt like lead. She turned her head on the soft pillow, looked over and saw that Chisé had already awoken and vacated the bed, but Maul was still there, fast asleep on the other side, and she found the source of the pain.

They’d fallen asleep holding hands the previous night, she realized, tucked underneath the pillows and the reason her arm was hurting was because it’d been in the same position for many hours. She gently let go of his hand, hoping not to wake him and sat upright, looking down at his sleeping form. Despite her arm feeling like a limp noodle and in uncomfortable pain, she couldn’t help but smile.

Maul shortly joined everyone for breakfast, and the atmosphere between them was peaceful. They sat next to each other again and ate, and Ahsoka suddenly wondered if he’d been having the same dreams as she was. He caught her looking at him, and normally she would have turned away in embarrassment, but this time she had an unexpected bravery within her this morning, and she maintained her gaze. He had a soft look in his eyes; he still looked a little tired, like he wanted to go back to sleep, but he also had a content, gentle expression on his face as they gazed at one another.

Ahsoka hadn’t felt this nervous in a long time as the group left Seelos’s atmosphere and headed for Ilun. She sat in the lobby with Chisé, and the two meditated, trying to calm down before they arrived.

“Uh…” Orion spoke up, looking out the window. “Are we expecting more company?” Ahsoka rose from her seat and joined him. Indeed, orbiting the planet Ilun was―

“The _First Light?_ ” she asked, confused. “What are they doing here?”

Maul looked back at her from his seat in the cockpit. “I was thinking about what you said yesterday, about being outnumbered,” he said with a shrug. “I requested Crimson Dawn’s assistance.

Maul directed his ship into the _First Light_ ’s hangar bay and the group exited. They were greeted once more by Dryden Vos, but instead of the guards in black robes surrounding him, there were warriors in bright red garb. Clearly, they were hand picked by Maul.

“Good to see you again so soon, Lord Maul,” Vos greeted with a bow. “You as well, Miss Tano.”

“You asked your warriors to help us?” Ahsoka turned to Maul as he joined them in the hangar, walking down the ramp.

“Vos will be taking care of Chisé as well while we’re gone,” he answered with a nod. He looked at her softly. “I told you I’d take care of it.”

Ahsoka smiled at him, touched. She really ought to stop being so surprised by him by now.

“So,” Rex cleared his throat, drawing their attention away. “The boys are ready to leave whenever you’re ready, kid.”

“My warriors are under your command, Lady Tano,” Maul agreed, folding his arms. “We will follow you wherever you go.”

“Aye, just say the word, Commander!” Wolffe voiced, raising his fist. Gregor, Frost and Orion agreed enthusiastically.

“Thank you all, really,” Ahsoka said, feeling a rush of pride for these people. She faced them all, standing upright with her hands behind her back. “We’re going to take this planet back from the Empire and save those kyber crystals. This isn’t just for me,” she concluded, looking to Chisé. “This is for all of us. For our future. May the Force be with you.”

The Crimson Dawn warriors and the brothers saluted to her, then left for their ships. Chisé ran up to Ahsoka as everyone separated, giving her a hug.

“Is this the last time I’ll see you, Master Ahsoka?” she asked, hiding her face in Ahsoka’s waist, who could feel her warm tears. Ahsoka stroked her hair.

“Yes,” she said sadly. She kneeled so that she was at Chisé’s eye level and put her hands on her shoulders. “I’m so glad I got to meet you Chisé, you’re a bright girl, and I know you’ll do great things in your life. After Maul comes back, he’ll take good care of you.”

“I know he will,” Chisé said, but the tears kept coming. “I like Master Maul, but I’m going to miss you.” They hugged.

“I’m so proud of you,” Ahsoka whispered into her purple hair. “Never forget that.” She stood as Vos approached.

“You _will_ watch over her well,” she warned him. “If you do otherwise, I will know.”

Vos nodded stiffly and swallowed. “Of course, Miss Tano.”

“Ahsoka,” Maul called to her, as he and the boys headed back to his ship. “It’s time.”

Ahsoka squeezed Chisé’s hand once more before joining him. She stayed by the door of the ship until the ramp closed all the way, watching the girl’s tear-stained face, and feeling her own eyes sting.

Before she met Chisé, Ahsoka had never once thought about having children of her own. Who she was as a Jedi, and who she’d been these past three years, she’d never even considered it throughout her whole life. But these past few days, Ahsoka had gotten to know this young Pantoran, and she’d come to care for her deeply, and she realized that she could have loved her like her own daughter. Taking care of Chisé, and the pride Ahsoka felt whenever she learned something new, it was a good feeling, and she was going to miss it. She was going to miss this feeling of what a parent must feel.

 _This was my one chance,_ she thought sadly as she sat next to Maul in the cockpit. _To get a taste of what being a mother is like. I will cherish this moment forever._

Maul was watching her all the while, studying her expression. She knew he could sense what she was feeling, but he had this look on his face that she couldn’t understand. She wanted to know what it was, but she could tell he’d closed himself off from her. Whatever he was thinking at that moment, he’d wanted to keep it a secret for some reason.

“Are you ready?” he asked her as they exited the hangar. Crimson Dawn’s shuttle followed right behind them. Ahsoka nodded to him.

“Here we go,” she said.

* * *

The two ships landed some distance away from the stormtrooper camp, and they gathered once more behind the steep hill.

“We want to do this with speed and efficiency,” Ahsoka began, addressing the group. “We divide the attack into two parts: first, we go for the troops outside of the wall. We want to take them out quickly, then we’ll regroup and set up a base. Crimson Dawn will be scanning for machines to see how many of those walkers they have inside the wall. This is my first time dealing with those kinds of transports,” she added with some hesitation. “So truthfully, I don’t know what to expect. We’ll need to be careful. Any questions?”

The group voiced in the negative and she nodded.

“We leave soon. Be ready.”

Ahsoka turned around, looking out over the hill to where the stormtroopers’ camp lay, folding her arms. It was going to be okay, they could do this. She heard the crunching of snow behind her and knew it was Maul walking up to her.

“Perhaps you ought to have this back,” he said, and she turned to look at him. He held out her smaller lightsaber. She shook her head.

“I want you to use it,” she insisted, pushing it back to him. Of course, she knew he was more than capable of fighting without one, they both were, but she wanted him to at least have it in his possession to put her mind at ease. He sensed what she was feeling and nodded, clipping it back to his belt, and gripped her shoulder with his warm hand in comfort before mimicking her stance, crossing his arms to squint at their target up ahead. Rex then came to stand on her other side. He lowered a pair of macrobinoculars from his eyes, squinting through the wind.

“It’s been a while since I’ve taken part in an operation such as this,” he admitted.

“It’s been a while for a lot of us,” she said. “Rex, I wanted to tell you…” She looked at him and smiled. “I can’t thank you enough for always being there for me, after all these years.” Feeling her eyes and nose sting, she knew it wasn’t from the cold. “Some things never change.”

“Indeed, some things never do,” he agreed, smiling back. “It feels like old times, eh, kid?” She nodded, an ache in her chest, and she sniffed, turning back to observe the camp again. She’d been a part of a war since she was a teenager, and it saddened her to finally realize and accept that she didn’t remember much of what her life was like before then. There were only flashes of memories, feelings that she could remember from her time before the war, before she was thrown headfirst into battle, before she met Anakin and Obi-Wan.

But even through all of that, Rex had been there―a good soldier and a good friend. Standing here on top of this freezing hill, about to dive into an attack with stormtroopers from the Empire, she wouldn’t have it any other way, being here with Rex and with Maul.

 _May the Force be with all of us,_ she prayed.

They snuck around the campsite, taking the soldiers by surprise, and within seconds, the fight was on. Ahsoka drew her lightsaber and ran, leading the attack herself. She ignited her weapon, redirecting and bouncing back blaster fire from herself and her friends. Gaining more speed towards the startled troopers, she leapt up and sped through the air, landing behind them and taking them down one by one.

Meanwhile, Maul, the Crimson Dawn warriors and the clones were occupied with their own troopers to deal with. As Ahsoka used the Force to push back a group of surrounding soldiers, she saw Maul use a force of strength that she hadn’t seen in him since Mandalore. He was ferocious, snarling and roaring with every deadly swipe of the lightsaber in his hands. The troopers were down instantly, impaled in the chest, or with their limbs and heads separated from their bodies. One trooper managed to shoot him in the leg, to which Maul growled in anger and used the Force to levitate him, bring him closer and skewer him through with the saber.

The Crimson Dawn warriors were a lot like the ones on Mandalore; with shining, red helmets and jetpacks, taking down the enemy one by one with their own blasters. Wolffe was roaring triumphantly as he took out a slugthrower nearly as big as him, teeth gritted as he fired on stormtroopers. Gregor, Frost and Orion had their varied weapons as well, with blasters, hammers and even axes to kill with.

Soon, Ahsoka found herself back-to-back with Maul. She felt a burst of courage with the feel of his back against hers, even with all of the soldiers closing in on him.

 _Bring it on,_ she thought.

 ** _That’s my girl,_** he answered, and she knew he was grinning.

She spun her lightsaber in her hand and the two charged in the same instant. She made a deadly arc with her saber, slicing the ends off of the blasters in front of her. The troopers looked down at their ruined weapons in shock before they were met with their end. Taking down more of the men surrounding her, she glanced back at Maul to make sure he was okay; and he was doing just fine as he twisted the small lightsaber into tight circles and letting the blaster fire glance off of it before taking the troopers head on. Ahsoka brought up a knee to collide with one trooper’s face, and then kicked him him and sent him toppling into the others

“Now this looks familiar,” she heard Maul say from behind her. She felt his shoulder bump her arm slightly as he swung his weapon.

“You talk too much during a fight,” she answered, a smile pulling at her lips.

After Ahsoka took out the remaining few troopers advancing on her, she saw one approach. This one was bigger and bulkier, his armor stretched to fit his large size, walking past his fallen comrades.

“He’s… big,” Maul noticed. Once he was in the clear, he came to stand next to her, but his and Ahsoka’s attention was quickly drawn away to the far end of the camp, where Rex, his brothers and the Crimson Dawn warriors were struggling with a new wave of the enemy.

“We’re overwhelmed over here!” Rex said into his comm link. “Could really use some help right now!”

“Go,” Ahsoka told Maul. She nodded at the large trooper headed their way. “I’ve got this.”

Maul nodded once and ran off to help the others.

She had a brief stare down with the lone trooper as he got closer, and then he stopped, several feet away from her. He then suddenly tossed his blaster to the side and advanced, sprinting towards her. Ahsoka took a deep breath, jumped light on her feet and swung her lightsaber towards his chest once he got close enough, but he quickly dodged, moving with surprising agility, and swung a giant fist. She leapt back in astonishment, wondering if he was a clone that’d been experimented on and given special abilities that the others didn’t possess. She rolled to the side, about to stab at his legs when he kicked her in the stomach―hard―and she was sent flying, dropping her saber in the process.

“Oof!” Ahsoka grunted as she crashed into a tent, nearly knocking her head against a support beam. She struggled to stand, a little dazed. She could see her weapon outside in the snow, but the soldier was already inside the tent, ripping the fabric open. Taking another deep breath, she relaxed, bending her knees and raising her fists.

“Come on!” she shouted and ran towards him. She punched at his chest and quickly recoiled from the pain, and he didn’t even budge! She shook off her hand and he aimed another punch for her head. She bent her knees and dove for the ground, trying to get behind him and once more land a hit, this time with her foot to his head. But the helmet was thicker than the helmets the other stormtroopers possessed; that or he just had a thick skull.

“Alright,” she muttered. She may not be able to match him in strength, but she could outdo him in other ways. As he tried to grab at her again, she used the Force to pick up a heavy crate inside the tent and threw it at him. It hit his chest and knocked him back a little, and she kept distracting him, throwing various items such as more crates, tools and even ration kits she saw in the tent. If she could just knock him backwards enough to give her some time to reach her lightsaber…

But he kept advancing, now about to charge. Thinking quickly, Ahsoka waited until he reached her, arms thrown out to grab her. She then grasped one of his thick arms, raised it in the air, turned her back to him and finally used his momentum to propel him out of the tent. The ripped fabric got caught on his armor and he landed in the snow, looking like one enormous, bulky sack. Ahsoka resumed her defensive stance, darting her eyes around for her lightsaber as he struggled to get up.

To her great dismay, the one obstacle that lay between her and it was the tent-covered trooper, who was now standing. He threw aside the fabric and sprinted towards her once more. She closed her eyes and summoned the saber, igniting it midair―

―and it swiped the trooper’s head clean off, flying towards her, and it landed into her hand with a satisfying _smack._

She hunched over, out of breath.

“Sir, are you alright?” Frost asked as he made his way over to her, putting his axe away.

“Fine, fine,” she waved a hand.

“We’ve taken the first camp,” he reported, standing upright. “Ready for our second briefing at your orders, Commander.”

Ahsoka cast her eyes about the camp in disbelief. They’d done it. She looked to where Maul was, helping Rex up. Noticing her, he faced towards her and nodded, which she returned. They’d completed phase one. And now it was time for phase two.

“Great work, Frost.” she said, noticing that he was still standing there.

“Doing my duty,” he responded, his voice rough.

“Everything alright?”

“Well, we realized the troopers here are, well…” He looked away uncomfortably. “They’re not… they’re not clones. Not like us.”

She stared at him, brow furrowed. To show her, Frost went to a dead soldier and removed his bloody helmet, revealing a face she’d never seen before.

“I… I don’t understand,” she said quietly, looking closely at the young man’s face. His hair was a light brown, his lifeless eyes a faded green.

“The Empire’s using regular ol’ people now,” Frost explained. “We’ve checked the other ones, too, they’re all different.” He stared at the dead trooper. “I guess clones are out of commission now. I don’t know if I should feel relieved or not. I suppose I should.”

* * *

They set up their temporary base in one of the few tents that hadn’t been destroyed in the battle. Maul and Crimson Dawn decide to land their ships right next to it, so as to be closer to everything else. Now that they’d attacked the camp, the stormtroopers on the inside of the ice wall were surely aware of their presence, and so there was no further need to hide their transports.

The Crimson Dawn warriors brought in a giant holoprojector as Ahsoka, Maul, Rex and the others gathered inside the tent.

“We’ve run a scan just as you ordered, Commander,” one of them, a lieutenant reported. She turned on the projector, and a hologram of one of the walkers materialized. Ahsoka observed, pinching her bottom lip with her thumb and forefinger in thought. Maul stood next to her, arms crossed and listening silently. “We counted five of these ‘walkers’ in the interior camp. We’ve been able to determine its function, as well as its weakness.”

Ahsoka nodded, encouraging the lieutenant to continue her presentation.

“As you can see here,” she went on. Pushing a few buttons on the holoprojector, the hologram of the walker increased in size and she zoomed in on the front of the machine, gesturing her hand towards it and circling it as she spoke. “Each one is equipped with two blasters in the front, both of an alarmingly large size. We are presuming that each machine requires two troopers inside: one for piloting and one for operating the blasters.”

“And its weakness?” Wolffe asked gruffly, stroking his beard. “What is its weakness? Though being a machine, I can’t imagine it has many. Just look at what it’s made of! The whole thing must be heavily armored.”

“That is correct,” the lieutenant confirmed. “It _is_ heavily armored. However…” She pressed a few more buttons and the hologram then focused on the walker’s underbelly.

“Is that the door?” Rex asked, stepping closer to investigate.

“Yes. It’s the only way in and out for the troopers. Because of that, it is the one and only vulnerable place.”

“A chink in the armor,” Gregor observed. “Good enough for me.”

“So we have five of these walkers,” Ahsoka said, thinking out loud, putting her hands behind her back. “And at least two dozen stormtroopers left to deal with.”

“Unfortunately, Commander, that is not all we found in our scan.” The lieutenant showed a different image this time, a giant oblong shape with metal limbs sticking out.

“Looks like a spider,” Orion said with some distaste.

“I’m afraid it’s worse…”

“What?”

“This one is not a walker, nor does it move around like they do, but rather, it is stationary,” she explained. “And its location, well… You’re not gonna like it.”

“Go on,” Ahsoka prompted.

“It’s at the core of the planet.”

Ahsoka’s jaw dropped. “What?” she voiced in disbelief.

“That’s where our scans picked it up, but its purpose, we cannot yet determine.”

Ahsoka paced around the room, orbiting the holoprojector and staring up at the image of the odd-looking contraption. “It looks like…” she said, looking closely. “Like it’s some kind of harvester,” she realized, eyes widening. “The Empire is taking the kyber crystals from Ilun’s very source: its core. That’s where they’re getting all of them.” She gritted her teeth. _Damn the Empire,_ she thought bitterly. She shook her head. “But the core is not like other planets, with molten rock and scorching temperatures, it’s the exact opposite. The machine may be operating just fine down there, but any living thing would freeze to death in only minutes.”

“We’ve also seen a special elevator to help with that,” the warrior explained. “The stormtroopers appeared to be using it to transport themselves rapidly to the core and back without killing themselves. We also detected a device on the surface, next to the entrance of the cave. It was used to heat up the elevator. However,” her helmet hid her expression, but her voice could not hide her disappointment. “That was destroyed the minute we started attacking the outside camp. I’m afraid we won’t be able to reach the core, Commander.”

“If we don’t take out that harvester,” Ahsoka said slowly, the words tasting bitter in her mouth. “This mission will have failed. There has to be a way.”

The group was silent, trying to think of a solution. The only sounds to be heard were the winds from outside of the tent, rustling the flaps and chilling Ahsoka’s bones. She didn’t care about the cold at the moment, however; they had a much bigger problem. It didn’t matter if they were able to take down all of the walkers and the stormtroopers within the ice walls. In the end, if they couldn’t get rid of that machine, if they couldn’t stop the extraction of all those kyber crystals, this all would have been for nothing. Ahsoka would have failed them all.

“I will go,” Maul spoke up, his voice sharp and clear in the silence. All eyes turned to him in surprise. He only looked at Ahsoka, his gaze never wavering. “I can do it, I will destroy it.”

Before Ahsoka could protest, before she could respond and say that it didn’t matter who went down there, that it would be impossible to take out the harvester, she remembered…

_“A Zabrak has two hearts…”_

His words from yesterday echoed in her mind like a tragic prophecy.

“No…” she tried to say, but her throat seemed to close up. All she could do was stand there frozen, staring at him from across the room. He looked away from her, addressing the group.

“I will still be exposed to the cold,” he continued, arm still crossed. “But I at least will be able to endure it a little longer and make it to the core.”

“Sir,” the lieutenant said, beating Ahsoka to it. “It is possible you will survive long enough to destroy the harvester, but making it back…”

“She’s right,” Rex agreed, concern written all over his face. “It’s a big risk.”

“A big risk, yes,” Maul said. “But a risk that must be taken, all the same.”

“Perhaps we could repair the heating device,” Frost suggested, but Maul shook his head.

“There isn’t enough time. I volunteer myself,” he insisted. “I believe I can do it, and I will not be convinced otherwise.” He looked at Ahsoka once more. “It’s what we came here for.”

Her mouth felt dry, her blood ran cold, colder than she thought was possible, as if she’d frozen to that spot forever. She swallowed with some difficulty.

“I’d like to speak with you,” she said calmly, even though she felt anything but. “Alone?” The air was tense, and everyone could feel it. Maul slowly unfolded his arms, never breaking eye contact her, then nodded.

He followed her outside, a few paces behind, as she led them back to his ship. They climbed up the ramp and went inside. Maul stood, waiting in the lobby for her as she closed the ramp, blocking out the howling blizzard winds. She stared at the lock, waiting until she heard the door shut with a thud, before finally turning to look at him.

“Why are you doing this?”

“I assure you,” he said with a humorless smile. “I’m not sacrificing myself to get out of taking care of Chisé.”

“You shouldn’t be sacrificing yourself at all,” she said, her voice sounding strange to her, it was oddly quiet and controlled, though her heart was hammering in her chest and her palms were sweaty.

“It must be done,” he answered, his manner equally controlled and collected. “There is no other way.”

“There _has_ to be,” she insisted, walking towards him. She wanted to cry and she wanted to scream at him, but she was too shocked to do anything. “Give me some time, I’ll―I’ll think of some―”

“There is no time,” he hissed, stepping closer to her. “Don’t you see that, Ahsoka? We’ve come all this way, _you_ have come all this way. This is what you wanted, isn’t it?”

His words sounded familiar somehow, three years ago when he was running from her:

_“You wanted this chaos.”_

The memory sparked a fire in her blood and she began to shake with rage. “Not like this,” she told him sharply.

“Unless you can find another solution within the next five seconds, you will not convince me to change my mind.” He then regarded her wearily. “I’m not running from this. I don’t want to run anymore.”

“But you―you can’t just―” she stumbled over her words, struggling to speak. Surely, he knew why she was trying to stop him. Surely, he understood _why._

 _Surely,_ she didn’t need to spell it out for him.

To her, it was _obvious._

“You’re a fool,” Ahsoka whispered, her anger fading, but her heart was still pounding, a new feeling arising and heating up her body. She bit her bottom lip to stop it from trembling.

“I’ve been a fool since the moment I met you,” Maul answered softly. He had a look in his eyes, like there was something else he wanted to say. “Ahsoka―”

But she didn’t let him finish. She stepped into his space, took his face into her hands and kissed him. It was a short, rushed kiss, but she hoped she was able to convey all of her feelings for him through her lips. He stumbled backwards and she released him and stepped back quickly, waiting in fear for his reaction. His eyes were closed, and when he opened them, he gazed at her with an expression that to her only said one word:

_Finally._

And he brought his hands to her back and tugged her towards him, crushing his lips to hers.

The last time she’d kissed someone was years ago with Lux Bonteri, when he tried to keep the Black Watch members from suspecting them. It had been a surprise and she’d pushed him away quickly, but she never forgot the feeling of Lux’s mouth on hers, as hasty as he’d been in that moment. She wondered over the next few years as she grew up, if she’d ever be able to kiss someone again, even though Jedi were not supposed to form such attachments. The thought that she _wasn’t_ a Jedi anymore, and could form any attachment she wanted, encouraged Ahsoka as she wrapped her arms around Maul’s neck to bring him closer.

This kiss was nothing like the one with Lux. Ahsoka felt like she was completely on fire, and Maul was all flames. He kissed her desperately, slanting his mouth over hers, and then tilting his head the other way to capture her lips again. He brought his hands up to grip her shoulders, tugging her arms tighter around his neck and somehow bringing them even closer together.

His tongue swiped at her lips and she opened her mouth, wondering what it would feel like to feel his tongue against hers and she sighed immediately. It felt _so_ good. _He_ felt so good. She couldn’t get enough of him, backing him against the interior wall of the ship so that their bodies pressed together, making sure their mouths never left one another. He made a surprised sound at the back of his throat that she found she liked. She glided her palms up against his warm chest, feeling his hearts beat rapidly beneath her fingertips, and she was sure her own heart was beating just as fast. She kept her hands there, feeling secure and safe as they kissed. Maul’s hands, however, couldn’t seem to decide where they wanted to be, running along her arms, then her back, her waist and her head tails.

Eventually they had to break apart and learn how to breathe again. She stared at his swollen lips, his white teeth; she stared into his golden eyes, his pupils blown wide open, and she shivered in delight. They said nothing, the silence electric and they could only hear each other’s breathing.

“I… I needed to do that,” she said softly as he panted, looking at her. He nodded, swallowed and said nothing as they gazed at one another.

Then, he gently reached underneath her head tails to lightly touch her neck. She thought he was going to kiss her again, but instead he pulled her to him, holding her close to his chest as his breathing slowly evened.

The intimate gesture finally brought tears to her eyes. This couldn’t be the last time she saw him, it just couldn’t. She buried her face in his shoulder, her wet eyelashes brushing against his neck. She squeezed her eyes shut, breathing in his scent and gripping his tunic tightly with her hands. The moment ended too quickly as he gently took her by the shoulders so that she looked at him.

“You should…” he said, his voice gravelly, then he cleared his throat. “You should go tell them it is time.”

She released a shaky sigh and stepped away from him, nodding. Still breathing hard, she turned away so that he didn’t see her wipe her eyes, and she opened the door, exiting the ship.

* * *

Anakin would have told her to be mindful of her thoughts and wary of her emotions, as they could cloud her judgement. If he was here with her, he’d have told her that no matter what she was feeling inside, and no matter how strong those feelings were, she should remember that her duty, her purpose came first.

 _We were never one for rules, though, were we?_ she thought.

“We’ll give you the signal when it’s clear to head for the core,” Rex said to Maul, speaking for Ahsoka, who’d fallen silent. “Good luck, and… make it back quickly, will you?”

“Thank you, I will try,” she heard Maul answer quietly.

They walked up to the icy wall, and they knew the stormtroopers were right behind it, waiting for them with their blasters and their walkers. Ahsoka’s group waited for her orders, and she looked up at the cloudy, white sky, squinting her eyes against the wind with a sad smile. She gripped her lightsaber tightly in her hand. Hopefully, the other one would return back safely…

_Wish me luck, SkyGuy._

And so the second assault began.

There was a fury of blaster fire from both sides. While her friends took on the troopers, Ahsoka sprinted across the snow and headed straight for a walker. She stabbed at it from underneath, carved open a hole and let it drop onto the ground. Then Maul was suddenly by her side, using the Force to draw the pilots out and kill them. She glanced at him briefly before turning her attention to the cave entrance. There was one walker there, but it left its position to join the fight, leaving only a handful of stormtroopers. She looked at Maul again.

“Go,” she said. “I’ll cover you.” He nodded and ran for the cave. She jumped up into the walker and quickly got into one of the seats. She’d have to pilot the machine and use the blasters one at a time to her frustration, but she was soon able to turn the vehicle completely around and aim for the cave. She gripped the controls and pulled the trigger. Red blaster fire shot out from the walker and at the stormtroopers, clearing a path for Maul. He ran in and disappeared without looking back.

Jaw clenched, she turned the walker back around to aim for the other walkers, but they were already on top of her. Sparks flew from every corner of the cockpit, and an explosion landed rocked her vision.

“You better get out of there, Commander,” the lieutenant warned through the comm link.

“Just a sec,” she said through gritted teeth. Squeezing the trigger again, she managed to take down one walker before another explosion shook her vehicle, nearly sending it toppling over. She looked up to see that a large hole had been created at the top, the edges all smoke and sizzling metal.

 _How convenient for me,_ she thought. She leapt out and back on the ground as a walker advanced towards her, shooting. Ducking behind her destroyed walker’s legs, she concentrated, closing her eyes and raising her hands. Then, using the Force, she pushed her walker, colliding it against the incoming one. The metal groaned as it crashed, and then exploded. She rolled out of the way to avoid falling debris. Satisfied, she stood and prepared to meet with more incoming troopers.

“I’ve made it to the elevator,” Maul’s voice said through the comm link. “I expect to be at the core soon.”

The next few moments were a blur, and Ahsoka wasn’t even sure how much time had passed by the time Maul reported back in, saying he’d made it to the core. She could hear him shudder from the freezing temperature.

“Fantastic,” Rex grunted, his voice coming through the comm. Ahsoka saw him shooting from behind a fallen walker. “Now hurry the bloody hell up and get back here!” She couldn’t have said it any better.

There were two walkers to go now, and the lieutenant and her warriors were currently taking down one, spraying white-hot flames from the devices on their wrists. However, the other walker fired on Frost’s barrier of crates from which he was shooting, and sent him flying through the air.

“Frost!” Ahsoka yelled. Orion made his way over to him and helped him up. He appeared greatly wounded.

"Frost is hit!" Orion shouted.. "I'm taking him back to the ship!"

"I've got you covered!" Ahsoka ran towards them, blocking a trooper’s blast with her lightsaber and jumped in front of the two men, shielding them from an incoming group of stormtroopers and the last walker.

“I’m with you!” Wolffe yelled, standing next to her and hoisting up his giant slugthrower, taunting them. “Come on!”

“This one’s for Frost!” Gregor joined in, and then Rex, and soon the rest of Crimson Dawn were by their side. They took down more stormtroopers, and they were _so_ close to the end, but there was still the one walker.

“Last one,” Rex bit out, firing a few shots and then looking at Ahsoka.

“I’ll handle it,” she said and she put her lightsaber away.

“Alright, kid, you’ve got it. Protect the commander!”

As the group defended her, Ahsoka closed her eyes and raised her hands again, concentrating with all her might.

_I’m one with the Force and the Force is with me, I’m one with the Force and the Force is with me… I’m one with the Force and the Force is with me…!_

She felt her grip on the walker through the Force and then closed her fists, opening her eyes. Its metal cockpit creaked and groaned loudly, stopping in its tracks, legs wobbling. Finally, the cockpit was crushed like a tin can. It shriveled, bunching together and it fell over onto the snow, exploding and killing the last of the stormtroopers surrounding it.

Ahsoka let out a breath she hadn’t realized she was holding and put her hands on her knees.

 _I did it,_ she thought. _We did it._

Rex put a hand on her shoulder and holstered his blaster. “Orion, come in,” he said into his comm. “How’s Frost?”

“He’s banged up pretty good, but I think he’s gonna make it.”

“Good.” Rex then caught Ahsoka’s eye. “Maul, report,” he said into his communicator.

Nothing.

 _The signal’s too weak,_ she hoped. _He’s not able to hear us because the ice is too thick._

“Maul,” Rex repeated. “Come in, Maul.”

Again, silence.

The Crimson Dawn lieutenant removed her helmet, looking at Ahsoka anxiously.

Finally, “I’m here.”

Ahsoka sighed with relief. “Where are you?” she asked, finally getting the courage. She walked towards the entrance of the cave, hoping to see him come out.

“I…” he said with difficulty, letting out harsh breaths. “I destroyed it. It’s done.”

“But _where are you?_ ”

“I’m in-in the elevator,” he answered. She heard a shiver and she felt colder than ever. “I’m not going to make it.”

“Yes, you will,” she insisted. “You can.”

She heard him let out a harsh laugh. “I cannot. My legs…. My legs are frozen. Ahsoka.” There was fear in voice. “I can’t move.”

She glanced back at Rex. He had a worried expression on his face, but he nodded to her calmly.

“Go,” he urged her. “We’ll get the ship ready. Get going, kid.”

“Ahsoka―” Maul’s voice came in. “I need to tell you―”

“Don’t you dare,” she cut him off. “I’m on my way.”

She sprinted inside the cave, nearly slipping several times on the icy ground, but she wouldn’t have cared if she tripped and hurt herself, as long as it didn’t slow her down. The inside of the caves were a lot different, now with a man made path laid out before her, signs leading to the elevator. She ran for only a couple of minutes, but it felt far too long. How much longer?!

“ _Damn,_ it really is cold here,” Maul said, his voice getting clearer through the comm the closer she got to him.

“I’m almost there!” she said, the panic rising in her voice. “Just hold on!”

“As long as the―” There was another shiver. “As long as the job’s finished,” he said tiredly.

“You did great,” she told him, and at last she saw the elevator. “I’ll see you soon, okay?” She hit the button to make the lift come back to the surface. “Okay, Maul? Come in!”

But he didn’t respond this time. Ahsoka was too scared to even pace back and forth as she heard the elevator begin to move. So she stood in front of it, frozen to the spot.

“Maul?” she asked, her voice came out at a higher pitch than usual. “Are you there?” A pain grew in her chest and she once more felt tears come into her eyes. “Maul? Come on, hurry up!” She screamed, her body shaking all over. She desperately hoped with all her heart that she’d see him when the doors opened, that she’d see him _alive._

It was another minute before they finally did open, and she nearly collapsed to the ground when she saw him. He was hunched over in the corner, unable to move. Upon destroying the harvester, the freezing temperature finally had proven to be too much for his machine legs to handle, and he must have fallen once he got inside the elevator, unable to reach up and activate it.

She kneeled by his side, lifting his chin. His eyes were nearly closed as he regarded her.

“Ngh… ‘Soka…” he said weakly. “Can’t… move… my legs.”

“I’ve got you,” she whispered frantically. She took his arm over her shoulders and wrapped an around his upper body, hauling him up and racing for the exit. “I have Maul!” she shouted into the comm link. “We need to _go now!_ ”

“We’re waiting for you by the entrance!” Rex responded.

Maul’s body was no longer warm, she realized with dread.

“Hold on,” she told him as she hurried to get back outside, and she tried to say encouraging things to him, though she wasn’t sure if he could hear her or not.

Maul’s ship was right outside of the cave, ready to go. Rex and Gregor were on the ground, ready to take Maul from Ahsoka’s arms and carry him inside.

“Hurry!” she urged.

“Taking off now!” Wolffe called from the cockpit, and they were off.

* * *

The Crimson Dawn lieutenant was reluctant to let Ahsoka and the others take their leader to a planet whose name was undisclosed to them, but she finally agreed after seeing the look on Ahsoka’s face through the holoprojector.

“Very well,” she agreed. “In the meantime we will take care of the girl. Let us know when you want us to bring her.”

“Thank you for understanding,” Ahsoka told her, and the transmission ended.

When they finally made it back to Seelos, the ship made a rough landing as the boys hurried to get Maul to the house, carrying him on a stretcher they’d found in one of the rooms. He was barely conscious and muttering something to Rex the whole way there.

“Okay,” Rex answered. “Don’t worry.”

“What’s he saying?” Ahsoka asked as she went ahead, opening the door to the house and then the one to the guest room.

“Let’s get this done quickly,” Rex said urgently to the others. “Ahsoka, get some more blankets and water, please.” She nodded and ran to a closet for the blankets, and then filled a bucket with warm water, her hands shaking all the while. When she made it back to the room, she’d found that the door was partially closed. She pushed it open…

And stopped cold at the sight in front of her.

Maul was groaning in pain, writhing about as Gregor and Orion struggled to hold him down. And his legs… his legs were gone. Wolffe had just finished detaching the machinery and all that was left was his black and red body. From where she was standing, Ahsoka could see where he’d been severed in half, could see the insides…

Rex noticed her standing by the doorway and walked quickly over to her, blocking her view, and then ushered her outside of the room.

“Is he…” she began.

“Wait out here, please,” he pleaded.

“W-why? Maybe I can… I can help.”

He had a pained expression on his face. “He asked… he asked that you don’t come inside, kid.”

Ahsoka kept still, shocked.

“Sorry,” he muttered. He took the blankets and water from her and closed the door. She didn’t move from her spot for a moment, unable to forget that image she’d seen, but then she realized that she didn’t want to hear any more painful noises coming from Maul while they took care of him, so she left the house and sat outside on the steps.

It wasn’t long after when Frost came to get her, his arm was in a sling.

“You alright?” he asked her as she stood.

“Yes. You?”

“I’ve been through a hell of a lot worse.”

“And… Maul?”

He pursed his lips but tried to smile. “He’s resting right now.”

She ran inside and then, not wanting to wake him, slowly opened the door with a loud creak. Maul was fast asleep on the bed, a pile of blankets on top of him and a warm, damp cloth on his forehead. She brought the uncomfortable arm chair over to the side of the bed and sat, watching him with her arms crossed, hands clenched into fists. She wanted to take his hand, but was afraid, afraid she might hurt him somehow, and then he’d never get better.

He was breathing evenly at least, his brow relaxed and he was hopefully sleeping peacefully. Against her will, she remembered what she saw earlier, Maul's body writhing about in pain and the _inside of it…_ it’d scared her. But she wasn't scared of him, no, she was scared _for_ him. It killed her to think of all the suffering he’d gone through for years after his body had been divided into two. Knowing that Obi-Wan was the one who’d done that to him, but also knowing Obi-Wan as a dear friend to her, Ahsoka didn’t know what to think.

She rubbed her face tiredly and rested her head in her hands.

 _Wake up soon,_ she begged silently.

But it was not meant to be. Maul continued to sleep for the rest of that day, and the entire day following. She and the others began to grow concerned, as he wasn’t able to eat or drink anything while he was unconscious. All they could do was sit and wait.

“When was the last time you slept?” Rex asked her that next day. He walked into the guest room with two cups of tea in his hands. She’d hardly moved from that chair since.

“I’ve dozed in and out,” she said sheepishly.

“Come on, you need some fresh air,” he told her. She reluctantly got up from her seat, casting one last glance at Maul before following Rex outside.

The two sat on the porch, watching the sun go down.

“Drink,” he urged her, noticing that the cup he gave her sat still in her hands. She took a small sip, not really having any appetite, but even that small drink reminded her how hungry she was. She looked over at Rex to see his brow furrowed, deep in thought as he drank his tea.

“Something on your mind?” she asked.

“Yeah,” he said slowly, setting down the cup. “Ever since we got back from Ilun… Something about the Empire’s operation still doesn’t sit right with me,” he admitted. “Will we ever find out what the Emperor was going to use all of those crystals for?"

Ahsoka turned her gaze towards the sun, which had now disappeared behind the sandy dunes in the distance. "We may never know,” she responded, dismayed. “But if there's anything I've learned about Palpatine, it’s that he's capable of doing all kinds of things we could have never imagined." It was the first time in years that she’d said that name, she realized.

“Wolffe and Gregor are bringing Chisé tomorrow,” Rex then said, wanting to change the subject.

“That’s good,” Ahsoka responded with a nod. She’d missed Chisé a lot and would be happy to see her. “Thank y―”

“It’s nothing,” he cut her off gently, waving a hand. “You’ve thanked me a million times over this past week alone. You know I’d do anything for you, kid.”

She smiled tiredly. “Likewise.”

“In that case, finish your tea and then come inside for dinner.”

As promised, Wolffe and Gregor arrived with Chisé the next day and Ahsoka hugged her tightly upon seeing her. They held hands and walked inside as the girl recalled all of the adventures she’d had on the _First Light._

“It’s funny, I thought I was scared of Vos,” she said during lunch. “But it felt like he was scared of me!”

“Well, as long as you had a good time,” Ahsoka said with a smile, shaking her head.

“Yeah, the lieutenant was super nice to me, too! She showed me how to use a jetpack.”

“It looks like you’ve been picking up quite a few skills this past week,” Ahsoka said, amused. And after they finished eating and Chisé helped Orion with the dishes, she turned to Ahsoka immediately.

“Can I go see him?” she asked, and Ahsoka knew who she was referring to. She nodded and put her hand on the girl’s shoulder, guiding her upstairs to the guest room.

Maul hadn’t moved an inch since he was laid onto the bed. The blankets were pooled around his waist now, however, to give his body some space to breathe. Ahsoka watched, hugging her arms and her chest tightening, as Chisé walked bravely up to him, took the cloth off of his brow and placed a sweet kiss on top of his forehead.

“Feel better soon,” she whispered to him, then came back to Ahsoka. “I’m going to go practice the moves he showed me with the stick,” she said. “Is that okay?”

Ahsoka nodded and smiled. Chisé grinned and left. Ahsoka took another glance at Maul and was about to leave, when she saw his eyes slowly open. She walked up to him, hand reaching out, but paused when he noticed her, and then turned onto his side, back facing her.

“How long have you been awake?” she asked softly, though she felt a little hurt that he wouldn’t look at her.

“Not long,” he answered. “How many days since our return?”

“This is the third day,” she answered. “Can I get you something to eat?”

“I’m not hungry.”

Why was he suddenly so distant with her? She carefully sat on the edge of the bed, looking at his back. She wanted to reach out and touch him, feel his warm skin. She’d do anything to comfort him in this moment.

 _I love him,_ she realized suddenly, and the thought hit her like a ton of bricks. _I love you, Maul._ She wanted to say it out loud, but it didn’t seem to be the right time. Whatever was going through his head at this moment, a love confession was probably something he didn’t need to hear. What _was_ he thinking?

She thought about when Rex had told her that he didn’t want her to come inside the room while they helped him. She felt a small acknowledgement through the Force, and she knew Maul could sense what she was feeling.

“I didn’t want you to see,” he said suddenly, his voice very quiet. And then, "I miss my brother."

Ahsoka finally reached out and stroked his back to try and comfort him, tracing his tattoos. Without thinking, her fingers eventually found their way to his waist, the part of his body where a lightsaber had gone through. She could see and feel all the rough scar tissue, merging into his metal legs.

He realized what she was doing and flinched. "Don't," he warned her, his tone sharp and clear.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to..." she began but suddenly he was dragging himself away from her, pulling the blanket over himself. "Wait," she tried to say.

"I'm tired, Ahsoka," he told her, but she could hear his voice shake.

"Please, Maul..." she said gently, feeling like she was just stabbed in the heart. "You don't have to hide from me."

But he didn't respond, didn't move, didn't even seem to breathe. Ahsoka stood and hugged her arms. It hurt her so much to see Maul like this, this man that she just realized she was in love with. It hurt her so much that she wanted to die, but she couldn't imagine what he was feeling. She wanted to be selfish and let him know how much he was hurting her by pushing her away, but he was already wallowing in so much self-loathing, that the best thing she could do for him right now was to leave him alone.

Ahsoka wordlessly left the room, closing the door behind her.

* * *

Maul was up and walking the next day, and it was all Ahsoka could do to avoid him. She continued to give Chisé lessons, meditating together, teaching her the ways of the Force and once in a while, showing her how the seven forms of lightsaber combat. It was a good distraction for Ahsoka. She enjoyed teaching, she found, but it was also good to get her mind off of Maul, if only for a short while.

Only two days had passed since Maul regained consciousness, and Ahsoka couldn’t take his silence anymore. They needed to talk.

She found him once more in the guest room, looking out the window, hands behind his back. He noticed her and turned to face her.

“How are you feeling?” she asked, her arms also behind her back after she closed the door.

“Better,” he said with some hesitation. “And you? How… how are you?”

“I’m fine,” she said with a nod.

“You don’t look fine.”

She took a deep breath. “No, I’m not. Far from fine, actually. I need to speak with you… about a _lot_ of things, about us, about Chisé―”

“Yes, I also need to speak to you about her,” he cut her off abruptly, turning away from her to look out the window again. “Now that the conflict on Ilun has been eradicated, I will follow through with our agreement. I shall take care of Chisé.” He paused. “And you can keep running.”

“I’m not running,” Ahsoka said defensively. “That’s what I’m trying to tell you. The three of us… we need to stay _together._ ”

He glanced at her, frowning. “But you had told me―”

“I know what I told you, but this isn’t the way we’re supposed to go. The Force has been trying to guide me all this time, and now I understand. Chisé is going to be a great Force user someday, but she doesn’t need one master, she needs both of us.” She stepped towards him. “She needs a balance, the dark and the light. You and I…”  she hesitated. “We need to be together.”

He stared at her, eyes wide, but then he seemed to recover and narrowed his eyes. “No, I think not.”

“What?” she said flatly.

“I agreed to help you on Ilun and to protect Chisé. But the three of us together, I don’t believe we discussed anything of the sort.”

“So I’m not allowed to change my mind?”

“I offered you protection before, but you refused. What should I say?”

“You should say that you want to come with me,” she insisted, her voice rising. “Because I know you want to. I know that you’ve been tired of being the leader of the Shadow Collective, it’s written all over your face.”

“So you’re going to _make_ me come with you?”

“No, I’m not going to make you. I want you to come with me, but only if it’s something that _you_ want.” She paused, a feeling of dread growing her chest. “It is… what you want, isn’t it?”

“No,” he said quickly, but she could see it in his eyes that he was lying.

“Then what about what happened between us on Ilun?” she challenged. “When we kissed? Did you just kiss me back for _fun?_ ”

“No, of course not!”

“Then what was going through your head? Tell me!”

“I thought I was going to die, Ahsoka!” he growled. “So I wanted my last memory to be a happy one. I never considered what happened after, because there wasn’t going to _be_ an after! _I was ready to die!_ ”

“Then why did you try to get back? Admit it, a part of you wanted to make it back to the surface―back to me. So why?”

“Because I do… _care_ for you,” he said with great difficulty. She knew he meant to say more; it was just hard for him to say the words, but that was okay. It was the push she needed, and she felt brave enough to say her next proposition:

“Run away with me, Maul.”

“What?” He gawked at her.

“I want to look for children all throughout the galaxy who are Force wielders like you and I,” she went on. At last, she knew what her path was. “I may not be able to defeat the Emperor, but maybe I can find and save these children, and give them a chance at life. I want you to come with me.”

“You’ve certainly grown bolder during these past few years, Ahsoka,” he said exasperatedly, taking a seat on the bed and staring at her. Ahsoka smiled a little with pride. She had, hadn’t she?

From this day on, she never wanted to be parted from Maul. She wanted him to always be by her side. He looked at her for a moment longer, then sighed in defeat, all anger erased from his voice.

“But it’s not possible,” he said. “I do want to be with you, Ahsoka, but we are not meant to be. I couldn’t… I’d never be able to give you what you need.”

“What do you mean?” she asked.

He opened his mouth to respond, but quickly closed it, unable to say it.

“Maul,” she said to him softly, stepping towards him. “It’s taken me far too long to realize it, _three years_ in fact, but I need you to know that…” She took a deep breath. “I love you. I love every part of you, I do.”

His eyes met hers briefly before looking away in shame. “No… I can’t… I can’t give you what you want, Ahsoka. I can’t…” He had to force the words out. “I’ll never be able to give you… children.” His voice was a near whisper at the last word, and she finally understood.

He looked so defeated, so humiliated as he sat there on the bed, turning his head away from her. It broke Ahsoka’s heart to see him like this and she felt tears come to her eyes.

She approached him slowly and kneeled in front of him, resting her hands on his shoulders.

“I do want to be a mother,” she began carefully. “I’ve gotten a taste of what that’s like with Chisé, and I love it. I love watching her learn and grow, and I love watching her with you.” His head turned slightly, but he still avoided her eyes. “Yes, I want to be a mother, but I want to be a mother to all of the children in the galaxy who need my help... who need _our_ help."

Being a woman was not all about giving birth to children, she finally learned. She was Ahsoka Tano, she was a Togruta from the planet Shili, and she was a _woman,_ and that was okay. It was okay that she used to be a Jedi, it was okay that she left the council all those years ago, and it was okay that she was who she was. She did have that power of being a mother and having children; she had that power and so much more. She finally saw that now. And as long as Maul was with her… her destiny, her path before her was _clear to see._

Maul raised his head to finally look at her, pain in his eyes, but with a trace of hope. She then put her hand on one of his metal knees, and he drew in a breath, trying not to flinch away. Ahsoka knew he still hadn’t quite fully accepted that part of himself, and that was okay, too. They had all the time in the world.

"I want to make a difference," she said, cupping his face in her hands. "But I don't want to do it without you. I couldn't. I want you to come with me. Please."

He held her gaze, tears threatening to spill from his golden eyes.

"Ahsoka," he breathed, in awe.

"Say yes," she pleaded with him.

"Yes," he said, covering one of her hands with his own. He nodded and repeated the word more firmly. "Yes."

Ahsoka smiled, and she ran her thumb over his cheekbone, looking into his eyes. His gaze flickered back and forth between her eyes and her lips. Then she leaned up to kiss him, stroking his face. She wiped away his tears as he kissed her back. He pulled away briefly, pressing another kiss to her lips, a smile growing on his face, before leaning forward again, wrapping his arms around her waist.

She then yelped in surprise, grabbing onto his shoulders as he suddenly picked her up, walked across the room and gently placed her on top of the table. She laughed while he peppered her face with kisses, on her forehead, cheeks, eyes and nose, and Ahsoka squinted her eyes shut, grinning. She then took his face in her hands to bring his mouth back to hers. She held onto his shoulders again as his lips parted and she explored his mouth. He sighed as they kissed. One of his hands rested firmly on her hip, scooting her closer to the edge of the table and towards him, while the other held the back of her head.

Maul then pulled back slightly and gazed at her, touching her face and running a thumb over the marking on her cheek, smiling at her softly.

“I love you," he said to her, and Ahsoka felt like she could fly in that moment.

"I love you, too.”

His eyes roved over her face, still caressing her cheek. "What have you done to me, beautiful Ahsoka?”

She returned his smile and leaned into his touch. “Whatever it is that you’ve done to me,” she answered.

* * *

Standing outside of the house, Ahsoka watched with a smile as Chisé high-fived all of her new uncles and then hugged Rex.

“We’ll see each other again,” he assured her as she tried not to cry. “And next time you can show me how much you’ve learned from your masters. Deal?” Chisé nodded wordlessly and then looked at Ahsoka.

“Where is Maul?” she asked.

“He must still be inside,” Ahsoka said, heading back to the door. “I told him we were leaving soon.” She saw him in the dining room, talking to a hologram of Dryden Vos. She didn’t catch what Maul said to the man, but Vos nodded stiffly, bowed and the conversation ended. Maul saw her come in and smiled.

“It’s taken care of,” he told her gently. “I’m ready to go now.” She nodded and smiled back.

Ahsoka saluted each of the men and Rex pulled her in for a hug.

“You don’t mind if we come visit once in a while?” she asked him. “I promise to stay out of trouble.”

Rex laughed. “You know I don’t believe a word of that, kid.” Ahsoka laughed as he then hugged Maul, who froze in surprise but slowly relaxed and patted him on the back stiffly; he clearly was not used to hugs, but that was something he could work on for himself.

“It was an honor to work with you, Maul,” Rex said. “And to now be your friend.”

Maul smiled. “It is an honor to be your friend as well, Rex.”

They waved their last goodbyes as they boarded Maul’s ship. Ahsoka beamed at Rex. She could see a tear slide down his cheek in joy and she wiped her eyes as they left Seelos. A feeling deep inside her told her it wouldn’t be the last time she saw her dear friend.

Their first stop was back at Ilun, and thankfully it was deserted as it always should have been. The place had been cleared of all the bodies and machines, as per Maul’s last request to Crimson Dawn. Chisé jumped up and down impatiently as she and Ahsoka waited for Maul to come out of the cave.

“When do I get to go in?” the girl asked, kicking at a piece of ice.

“When it’s your time, my young padawan,” Ahsoka teased. Maul eventually emerged from the cave, showing Chisé the two kyber crystals he’d gotten.

“Wow!” Chisé exclaimed. “Are you going to make your lightsaber with those?”

“Yes,” he told her with a smile. He and Ahsoka each took one of Chisé’s hands as they left.

“Where to next?” Maul asked once they were out of Ilun’s atmosphere. Ahsoka thought for a moment, trying to find the words.

“This is going to sound a little ridiculous, but… I’ve been having these visions,” she began. The word “visions” caught his attention and he looked at her.

“Of an island?” he asked slowly. She nodded, amazed.

“Have you been having them, too?”

“Yes. Yes, I have.”

She smiled at him. “Then I think we both know where to go.”

He returned her smile. “Yes, I think we do.” Then they jumped to lightspeed.

Hours passed before they reached a planet, mostly filled with water, but with tiny islands scattered throughout here and there. As they passed through the clouds and came into view of the place, Ahsoka gasped, putting a hand on Maul’s arm. This was the island she’d seen. They exchanged glances and he steered the ship towards land.

Chisé bounded out of the ship, happy to finally stretch her legs. “Race ya to the top!” she said, pointing to a steep set of stone stairs. Ahsoka and Maul held hands as they tagged along behind her. Truthfully, Ahsoka would have been a little disappointed if just like in her dreams, the island had been deserted, but to her happy surprise, the place was occupied after all. The natives of the island, women of an alien life form that were half Ahsoka’s size, greeted them as if expecting them.

“Hello,” Chisé greeted shyly with a wave.

One of the women, presumably one of the eldest of the group, stepped forward and spoke in her native tongue. Through the Force, Ahsoka was able to understand her.

“My name is Ahsoka Tano,” she greeted. “This is Maul and Chisé. We’ve seen this island before, in visions.”

The older woman nodded and said that this planet was called Ahch-To, and that she knew they were looking for a place to train more padawans.

“How did you know?” Ahsoka asked in amazement.

 _“The wind has spoken both of your names,”_ she answered, regarding both her and Maul. _“Both of your destinies are tightly interwoven together, more than you realize. But in time, you will see it.”_

Ahsoka glanced at Maul again. It was true, she didn’t know what she was talking about, but she had a feeling that eventually she would understand. It wouldn’t be today, and it probably wouldn’t be tomorrow, but someday…

The women helped them settle in, and once they’d gotten accustomed to the stone huts, Ahsoka and Maul walked to the highest point on the island, overlooking the ocean. He helped her dig a hole into the ground. To both of their surprise, they saw a group of small creatures waddle towards them, chirping and flapping their wings.

“They’re called porgs!” Chisé told them, holding a box in her hands. “That’s what the ladies told me. Aren’t they cute?”

“Yes, they are,” Ahsoka said, accepting the box from her. She opened it and held out her hand towards Maul, who gave her the small lightsaber. She put it, and the one hooked on her belt into the box and closed it. After they buried the box, covering it and packing down the dirt, they stood for a moment in silence. No words needed to be spoken as Ahsoka reminisced, thinking of Anakin.

Finally, as Ahsoka sat in one of the stone huts, she was able to make her own lightsabers, and they were a bright white. She felt like a completely different person now―no, that wasn’t it. She’d grown, that’s what it was. From behind her, she heard another saber ignite. She turned around and saw Maul wielding his new double-bladed lightsaber. He stared at it, perplexed.

“It’s… blue,” he observed.

“Blue means the kyber crystals recognize you as a guardian.” She smiled. “I couldn’t agree more.”

Then they both began to hear whispers. They stepped outside of the hut where Chisé was practicing her calligraphy, and the whispers became more clear, travelling through the gentle breeze. Wordlessly, the two followed the voices to the source and after a bit of a trek, they came across an ancient tree, completely surrounded by a fog. They went inside the tree, which had a large hole in the center. Ahsoka ran her hand along the smooth grooves in the wood, wondering if the tree had been carved out or if the hole had been created naturally.

“What is that?” Maul wondered, walking past her towards a small shelf, which housed multiple books. Carefully, he picked one of them up and Ahsoka read the text over his shoulder. “These are old,” he observed. “Extremely. Older than anything I’ve ever seen. Older than, perhaps,” he added, looking at her. “Both the Jedi and the Sith.”

They read through the books the entire afternoon, sitting on a spot of grass while Chisé chased some porgs around. Page turners they were most definitely not, but stocked full of so much knowledge that Ahsoka didn’t want to stop reading. These books, she realized, contained concepts practiced by both the Jedi and Sith. Somehow over the years, a great divide was created and the concepts were made to be a lot more complex, thus creating the two factions. But clearly, these books made the basic foundations of learning the Force and wielding it, in a sort of gray area.

Maul watched as she furrowed her brow and smiled, wrapping his arm around her shoulders.

“I think,” he said to her and she looked at him. “The future generation will be in good hands.” She smiled and nodded, and he kissed her. Everything felt perfect. There was still a lot of fear and darkness in the galaxy, but she knew everything would be okay, as long as Maul was with her. He was her other half, and she was his. They would work together to find the children who needed their help, and what that would mean for their future and the galaxy’s future, she found that she could look forward to it, because she had him.

“Look!” Chisé called, pointing at the horizon. “Isn’t that sunset beautiful?”

The two lovers looked to where she was directing their attention. Ahsoka sighed happily and rested her head on Maul’s shoulder, basking in the warmth of the binary sunset.

THE END

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And that's a wrap! I already feel sad that it's over ;_;
> 
> This story has definitely been a wild ride from start to finish for me, and I was lucky enough to have a lot of time on my hands this past week to write the whole thing. And I have to say I'm glad that I was able to write this story in that time frame! After nearly 40,000 words, I feel like I've grown so much as a writer, and this is a work that I'm most proud of, even though there can always be more improvement for sure!! ;)
> 
> Speaking of which, should I divide this chapter in two, make the part where they leave Seelos for the last time as an epilogue? I definitely don't want this chapter to seem like it keeps going on forever haha! :)
> 
> Finally, thank you so so much reading this story and leaving your kudos and comments. It's been a very short amount of time that I've gotten obsessed with this pairing, and it makes me proud to be a Star Wars fan. I'm so happy that I made the decision to catch up on The Clone Wars and that I got to know Maul and Ahsoka and care about their characters. There are so many things that I love about them that I could just talk about them forever! And of course I couldn't help myself but a write a super sappy, romantic, happy ending! It's what they deserve, and it's what we all deserve in our own lives!!!
> 
> Thank you so much again for reading <3 <3 <3 <3 <3


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